Mama Yamas

Surrender

2010-06-29T22:06:00.000-07:00

Ishvara Pranidhana ~"Through surrender the aspirant's ego is effaced, and . . . grace . . . pours down upon him like a torrential rain." B. K. S. Iyengar (Light on Yoga)

During last night’s yoga practice my body remembered. I am beginning to heal.

I let my mind surrender to my body and I could feel the fibers of my muscles, my skin, and even my bones recall what they need to do. As my body began to work in each pose my mind unclenched, began to trust, and again there was that little spark of hope and optimism.

Surrender.

I am trying to relearn letting go, surrendering to a “higher source”. Before This Time when my body knew daily practice, I, without thought, began to practice Ishvara Pranidhana. My practice taught me faith and that faith brought about inner peace. And really, isn’t that what I so desperately need? Inner Peace.

In “The Practice of Surrender” Shiva Rea explains that “Like the descent through layers of tension to rest in the release of Savasana , Ishvara pranidhana provides a pathway through the obstacles of our ego toward our divine nature—grace, peace, unconditional love, clarity, and freedom.”

So this practice of surrender is my focus for the week. In the mean time, Grace, please feel free to rain down.

Whatever

2010-06-23T21:45:00.000-07:00

Remind me to tell you about my thyroid postpartum rollercoaster ride sometime. For now, I will sum it up by saying for the second time in my life I am on the hypothyroid end of Postpartum Thyroiditis. My thyroid disease is obviously tied directly to the birth of my son and thus plays an important role in my postpartum issues. Initially it went hyper which was horrible. I was actually looking forward to “hypo”. Can I just say “hypo sucks”?

I’m lethargic, irritable, easily confused, just typing this is difficult. I’m also gaining weight.

Did I mention that my husband is avoiding me?

I want off this ride.

Husband

2010-06-18T15:10:00.000-07:00

Alabama, Arkansas, I do love my Ma & Pa
Not the way that I do love you

I never really wanted to get married. I never thought of myself as the marrying type. I know sounds strange but it’s true.

Holy roly, me, oh my, you’re the apple of my eye
Girl, I’ve never loved one like you

I met James when I was 30 and we both had baggage like you wouldn’t believe. We were perfect for each other. When I knew he was going to profess love I told him that I felt he should know about my anxiety issues before he made any decisions. He shrugged it off and told me that he was going blind (macular degeneration-though in reality he will probably never go blind). So it was settled; we were in love.

Man, oh man, you’re my best friend; I scream it to the nothingness
there ain’t nothin’ that I need

We moved in together and a little while later got pregnant. Yes out of wed lock. But who were we to care. We were in love. Unfortunately the parental units had a problem with it and to prove his love to my father James declared he would drag me down to the Justice of the Peace right then and marry me.

I was not in agreement.

Well, hot & heavy, pumpkin pie, chocolate candy, Jesus Christ
There ain’t nothin’ please me more than you

Eventually, after long tear filled conversations with my mother and ranting from my father we gave in and a friend of mine got certified on line and declared us married.

Home
Let me come Home
Home is wherever I’m with you

And that is how I became a wife and he became a husband.

Take me Home
Baby, I’m coming Home

The term wife has always been slightly uncomfortable. Sort of like an ill fitting pair of pants. You know, the kind that leave that gap in the back waist so that passer byes can see your underwear when you bend over. “Wife”…”husband”…weird labels that mean little to most of the people who wear them.

I’ll follow you into the park, through the jungle, through the dark
Girl, I’ve never loved one like you

Life as a married couple has not been easy for us. We moved many times, financially struggled, bumbled our way through learning to parent two children (and now three). The stress has been overwhelming at times so overwhelming I wanted nothing more than to run like hell.

Moats & boats & waterfalls, alley ways & pay phone calls
I’ve been everywhere with you

This year has changed everything. I have had an epiphany of sorts. I looked at James the other day and said “You know babe, if I hadn’t been pressured into marrying you years ago, I would want to marry you right now.” And that is the truth of it. I want to throw on a white dress and run barefoot down an isle with rice flying everywhere and vow to never leave him.

We laugh until we think we’ll die, barefoot on a summer night
Nothin’ new is sweeter than with you

Without him, I would have never gotten through the birth of my son the way I did. Without him, I wouldn’t be able to survive the sharp teeth of the dog eat dog business world. Without him, I wouldn’t have any hope of getting better.

Things are hard but most days we make each other laugh so hard ...

And in the sticks we’re running free like it’s only you and me
Geez, you’re something to see.

And as people cycle in and out of our life, his unchanging face is the thing that keeps my heart from getting broken over and over again.

Alabama, Arkansas, I do love my Ma & Pa
Moats & boats & waterfalls & pay phone calls

It’s me and him against the world…and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Ahh, Home
Let me come Home
Home is wherever I’m with you
Ahh, Home
Let me come Home
Home is when I’m alone with you

Where troubles melt like lemon drops

2010-06-09T20:20:00.000-07:00

Someday I'll wish upon a star

And wake up where the clouds are far behind me.

Away above the chimney tops,

That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow, blue birds fly.

Birds fly over the rainbow

Why then, oh why can't I?

Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue.

And the dreams that you dare dream,

Really do come true.

(My favorite song and movie as a young girl. I heard it last night and it suddenly meant so much more.)

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

2010-06-08T20:39:00.000-07:00

Last week, for the first time since long before Jude was born, I spent the night alone with just my baby. James hasn’t left me on my own for many obvious reasons which I have been much appreciative of. Deciding to separate over night was a big decision when we found out that he had to go out of town. I was terrified that I would have an anxiety attack in the middle of the night and have no one to support me. Fortunately a couple of good friends offered to keep their phones on overnight which was so very reassuring.

I have to admit, I was teary when James and the girls left and I felt lonely in the evening but I did ok. Jude slept in bed with me and I enjoyed cuddling him. No scary thoughts. No anxiety. What a relief.

Sunday I ran the whole Heaven Can Wait 5k. My only goal going in to it was to run the entire course. I didn’t care how fast. I ran in memory of my friend Amy who died from breast cancer almost exactly a year ago. I ran with 4400 plus people. It was an incredible and moving experience. It was yet another step towards healing.

I was riding high on my successes yesterday, so I was shocked to wake up last night terrified and confused at about midnight. I spent approximately 20 minutes in a warm bath trying to clear my head of frightening thoughts. I wanted to cry.

I am so disappointed. My confidence is shaken. I have moments where I want to give up trying. But I hit the pavement running again this morning and it made me feel a little better. Tonight before I go to bed I will try to infuse myself with positive thoughts. There is so much to hold onto: my beautiful girls, my sweet babe, a husband who never gives up on me, and some of the best friends a person could hope for. So much love. Now I just have to figure out how to drown out the rest.

My little B

2010-05-31T21:53:00.000-07:00

Magic happened this weekend. Saturday James and I took the kids to the Maragas open house and for the first time since giving birth, everyone in my family was filled with a beautiful lightness. The setting was breathtaking; the music was uplifting, the wine was incredible; and watching my oldest try to catch her breath through her smiling lips after playing tag football with a group of new friends lifted my heart.

“Mama this is the best day ever.”

“Mama, I’m so happy.”

“Thank you so much for bringing me to the party mama.”

When I was in labor she lay in her bed curled up a in a little ball with an aching stomach. She was so scared. After I gave birth she continued to complain about her tummy hurting and through tears told me she wanted my stomach to go away.

It’s been a rough road for my oldest since then. From one day to the next I’m not sure what mood she’ll be in. There have been tears, fits of anger, and sadness. She lashes out at her sister and both James and I and then cries for cuddles. I swear I have worried about her more than the baby.

She is my first baby. She saved my life. She is the reason I am who I am today. And now it’s my turn to help her pull out of a nose dive both at home and at school. To be honest, sometimes I am terrified I will fail her.

But this weekend the beautiful, intelligent, funny, loving little girl I have always known her to be returned and I am holding on to her for dear life. I can feel her try to slip away, but I won’t let her go. She will be alright.

We will all be alright.

Perfect Love

2010-05-26T20:59:00.000-07:00

I’m tired and blue.

I believe my life is filled with more beautiful than bad.

All of the holes should be filled.

Filled with businesses and babies and love.

Perfect love.

But I am still tired and blue.

A Much Needed Reminder...

2010-05-24T19:53:00.000-07:00

After a long hard day...

Roots

2010-05-23T15:04:00.000-07:00

Out in the yard again today with one last flowerbed that needed to freed from weeds. I was shocked at how long and deep the dandelion and long grass roots ran as I began jerking them from the ground. A wide array of ugly weeds had grown up around shrubs, plants, and flowers that are aching to bloom.

At first I was standing stooped over only planning to tug a few out, but as I pulled my mind began to work and travel into the past. Before long I was on my hands and knees yanking and digging and chopping away. I started to realize how closely weeds resemble the bad memories of those skeletons we all have in our closet. Those painful moments in our life that never quite go away. Their memories seem harmless at first, easily ignored; but if left alone too long they take root and spread.

Like weeds, the roots of our most painful memories push deep and gain strength. They wrap around the healthy part of us that want to grow, bloom, and flourish. They choke the life out of our full potential until it withers and nothing remains except for weeds.

Pulling those weeds was cathartic. Feeling the roots rip out of the ground reminded me that I am strong, much stronger than anything that has happened in the past (near or far). It also reminded me that avoidance doesn’t work. Whether through writing, yoga, running, or talking; working through difficult times, or going back and working through the pain of memories is the only way to move forward and become what we are meant to be.

Aum, Shanti, Shanti, Shanti, Aum
(Aum, Peace, Peace, Peace, Aum)

Sprout

2010-05-22T18:50:00.000-07:00

Today I decided to go out and work in the preschool garden. I have never been much into gardening but we knew letting the children watch their food grow from seed would be a beautiful learning experience for them.

Today working with the soil made me feel grounded and connected. At peace. Seeing sprouts emerge from the seeds we planted weeks before was like receiving a small shock of inspiration.

The blooms on the blueberry bush right after a midday hail storm gave me hope.

I can heal.

Aging Up!

2010-05-21T11:52:00.000-07:00

Today is my birthday and the universe decided to give me the gift of an amazing party and two peaceful days. I am filled with gratitude and love for the amazing people in my life. 36 is going to be a transformative year.

Backslide.

2010-05-18T11:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was disappointing.

Sunday night I woke up and struggled for about 20 minutes. It was a sleepless night and at 3:30 my husband sent me into the guest room to sleep while he took over baby care.

Yesterday I was exhausted and while carrying my son down the stairs in his car seat I tripped yet again. I missed a step and the car seat slammed to the floor and almost went tumbling down the steps. The teachers from the preschool and my office manager came running. Jude screamed, scared but not hurt. I felt sick.

What if I had let go of the seat?
What if his neck and head had been hurt?
What if he hadn’t been in the car seat?

All the things that could have gone wrong. All of the things that can. Even my husband was concerned about the fact that my feet can’t be trusted. The second fall in one week.

At dinner the girls began to argue and suddenly I was overwhelmed with the feeling that something horrible was about to happen. I could feel my whole body knot up into a little ball. I had to ask my husband to come sit by me and rub my back until it passed. I didn’t want the girls to catch on. I knew it was going to be a long night.

Sure enough at midnight I woke up to feed the baby and the world started to spin out of control. All of the terrible things that could happen…will happen. My stomach was sick with it. It felt like it took every last bit of strength I had to stay connected to my body.

I told my husband I can’t stand the idea of being like this forever. What if every day for the rest of my life, I have to experience these awful thoughts and visions? He says I’ll get better. He says I’m getting better. It’s just a small backslide.

Today I want to cry. He looks tired. I feel tired.

I don’t want much. I just want to be with my family at peace. The idea that death will eventually come is too much. I can’t stand the idea of ever being separated from them. I have lost the switch that turns off the fear of death and losing. I want it back. I want to flip it and only see the happy times that are ahead.

Wanting Nothing

2010-05-16T20:51:00.000-07:00

I was inspired by a friend of mine who is also struggling with postpartum issues. She has started running. She says it isn’t a cure but that it helps. So Saturday morning the husband and I put our two girls on bikes and the baby in a stroller and took off for a 1.7 mile jog. I made it all the way without having to walk which I thought was nothing short of a miracle. Afterwards I felt wonderful…euphoric. Uncommon feelings in the last five months. I started to think my friend was wrong and that this could be the turning point.

It wasn’t. I still felt uptight throughout the day and while nursing my son to sleep that evening, the dread crept back in. But not as much as the night before.

My worst “episodes”, as I have come to call them, take place in the middle of the night if I am awoken. On the worst occasions, I am embarrassed to admit, I have even called 911. But usually I just pace the house in fear and despair. Saturday night when I was unexpectedly pulled out of sleep by my son, nothing happened. Nothing. I never knew nothing could be so wonderful.

This morning we got up and did it again. My body is aching! Unfortunately on the jog my foot caught the curb and I skid across the asphalt. Elbow and hands bleeding and hip throbbing, I got back up and jogged the rest of the way home. Today, I have noticed a bit more of a struggle with my emotions. In fact as I sit here, I can feel anxiety trying to creep in. I will do some yoga. I think back bends and Inversions.

I have hope. A little more each week…I think. Tomorrow we will run again. I won’t give up.

My Life For Now

2010-05-14T18:12:00.000-07:00

I now have a son. I never imagined I’d have a little boy. I grew up with two sisters and always wanted to have girls.

I have fallen in love with blue.

This is my last baby, I will have no more. With this in mind, I desperately wanted pregnancy, childbirth, and his first year to be perfect. Magical.

What is perfect? Everyone rejoicing around his arrival. A beautiful, natural water birth. Baby bliss for months after. I don’t know where the fantasy that I had created came from. I am not new to motherhood. I have two beautiful daughters. I know the pregnancy, birth, and postpartum scenario. But oh how I wanted that dream to come true.

I gave birth naturally. I had three and a half days of difficult labor. The story is long and not ready to be told, but for the purposes of this post let’s just say my beautiful water birth didn’t happen, and while triumphant and transformative, my son’s delivery left me exhausted and week.

After Jude’s birth all of my fantasies about how the first year would be slowly began to dissolve leaving me in an unfamiliar territory. My postpartum periods with both of my daughters presented challenges but nothing I couldn’t work my way through with a little effort. This time is different. Some nights it takes all of my effort to convince myself that things will get better. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I have found myself in postpartum depression/anxiety.

It started creeping in the day after Jude was born; some level of fear or darkness lurking in the back of my mind at all times. I stayed sequestered in my room for weeks after I gave birth. Sometimes in the evening I would try to join my family downstairs for the evening, but if there was any amount of noise or stimulation I would feel overwhelmed and get tearful. Retreat to my room.

As the weeks went by I found it more difficult to leave the house and started waking up in the middle of the night in a panic. Sometimes my heart would be pounding so hard I was sure I was going to die, sometimes I was overwhelmed with a feeling of dread. And finally the moment came when I couldn’t handle it any longer. I ran into my husband’s office and told him I needed help.

I am fortunate, I have a wonderful husband and amazing friends who are helping me make my way through each day and slowly heal. I am not all better. I still find myself pacing the house in the middle of the night terrified that the morning will never come, but this is happening less and less, and for the first time since my son was born, I have moments filled with hope.

I know that I am not alone in this, but I also know that many women don’t want to talk about it. Don’t want to share. Feelings of shame and guilt are common.

I am going to share from now until the day I know I am better. I am going to be honest about each day or night’s struggles and what I am using to cope. I hope that it will inspire other women who are out there suffering right now to reach out to someone. I hope that if some of you have advice on how to cope with the toughest moments you’ll share.

One of the current treatments I am using to help myself get better is yoga. Daily, I practice. Sometimes in the middle of the night I do sequences. When I am filled with terror it is Adho Mukha Svanasana, Uttanasana, Trikonasana and on and on until I begin to calm.

Aum, Aum, Aum.
Namaste.

The First Day of Preschool!

2008-11-18T19:31:00.000-08:00

The Village Preschool II is up and running!

Yesterday was the first day at the new preschool and it was wonderful. It was so fun to meet new friends and watch them interact with a new environment. The children loved pretending like they were animals while they learned several yoga poses including: Downward Dog, Upward Dog, Cat and Cow, Tree Pose, Triangle Pose, and more. Yoga was followed by art play with glitter and glue, resulting in sparkly names that were hung on the wall. A little running and sand play… I would say that makes almost a perfect day. Can’t wait to see what the rest of the week brings!

Lovin the Art!!

Really Lovin the Snack!!

The Village Preschool II Is Up and Running!

2008-11-12T20:42:00.001-08:00

Click On Me For a Better Read!

Checking for Dilation and the Scale

2008-11-04T12:44:00.000-08:00

First and foremost….If you haven’t voted…what are you waiting for? Get out there!

Here’s my latest thought: Constantly using the scale to measure weight loss is much like using dilation to measure the progress of your pregnancy. Let’s face it, dilation as a means of measurement is a crock. You can be at 4 centimeters one minute and then shoot up to 7 in a matter of minutes. This is why, with my last pregnancy, I didn’t let the nurses check my cervix until I was sure I was about to push (grunting noises were a dead giveaway). Instead I listened to my body.

I mean, how deflating is it to labor for hours and hours and find out you are only dilated to 3 cm? Not that it actually means anything, but even if we know that, it can break our confidence. Or in many cases, give us false hope. Every pregnant woman I know goes to the doctor and has her cervix checked a month before her due date and 80% of them find out they are dilated to 2 or 3 cm. Of course this convinces them that the baby is coming early! And of course makes those 3 or 4 days past the due date extra painful!

The scale is very similar. I don’t know how many times I have woken up looking and feeling thinner only to be disappointed when I step on the scale. Even if my pants are looser, or my husband oohs and ahs. I find my motivation slipping away and that grilled cheese sandwich starts sounding mighty enticing.

So I have decided to try something new. Instead of stepping on the scale every day, I am only getting on once or twice a week. The last time I weighed in (last Friday) I was down 5.5 lbs. Wednesday or Thursday I will hit the scales again. FYI, I have been feeling great and it shows as well. I just don’t want my confidence to slip.

One final note: I am in the bad breath fat loss stage. I had forgotten how bad fat burn can make your breath smell. Yikes. My poor husband, he is so excited about how I look but when he comes in for the kiss he can hardly hide the flinch…Lot’s of Listerine helps. Oh well, it will be well worth it in the end. My breath also works nicely as a tool to get him to scoot over and give me more room on the bed..or couch..

Banana Pudding

2008-11-02T19:21:00.000-08:00

So basically I don’t like anything banana. That’s why I have been avoiding the banana pudding medifast snack/meal. I save my pudding for my last meal of the day. A tasty last note to end my day on. I have been enjoying the chocolate pudding (while my girls and husband snork down the Halloween candy) except for one night when I added too much water. FYI: soupy pudding is disgusting.

So last night I eagerly tore open my evening pudding packet and to my dismay realized I had grabbed the banana pudding. Well, I’d much rather gag the banana pudding down than waste a meal…I have become a penny pincher in these tight times. Man! Was I impressed? That was the best banana pudding I ever tasted. In fact I have noticed that all of the medifast meals are tasting increasingly better.

A friend of mine was teasing me and saying that starving will make even the crappiest food taste good but the truth is, yesterday and today I have barely felt hungry at all. In fact I have to really keep track of the time to make sure I get my meals in. The only time I have found myself craving my old comfort foods is right before lunch, especially if I wait the full three hours to eat. Other than that, I’m pretty satiated.

Ok, so here is the one drawback I have found to the diet; at least once a day I seem to get a little…well… flatulent. Fortunately my husband is always down for a good fart joke and I am also typically by myself in the office editing or writing. And the girls, well “tooting” is also always good for a laugh at their age as well, unfortunately tooting always leads to potty talk…grrr.

So anyways, I am eagerly waiting for pudding hour to roll around. I plan on breaking the banana pudding open early so I can mix it and chill it before oh so slowly enjoying every last spoonful…and licking the bowl clean. I’m a changed woman.

Mmmmm banana!

Trick and No Treat

2008-11-01T13:50:00.000-07:00

Halloween was a blast! The kids had a great time as we met up with a group of cool families and did the rounds. I was pretty stressed about sticking to my diet as there were a couple of parties and I really was mourning having to miss out on the hot toddies. As it turned out, we were too tired to hit the parties after winding our way through the neighborhood so we all just hung out at the house to visit and and let the children play. It was great! I am not a fan of beer so it wasn’t hard to go without a drink. The pizza that one of our friends brought did look good but I held strong!

Woke up today feeling slimmer and for the first time I have experienced the bursts of energy promised by the program. In fact I have been a little hyper at times. Day 7 is looking good. So far I give Take Shape for Life 2 thumbs up!

By the way, I have signed up for a yoga retreat next Friday night. I think yoga and this diet will go hand and hand beautifully. If you are interested in starting up yoga, I have the perfect teacher for you. Nadine Sims is the owner of Yoga of Bend. Check out her website at www.yogaofbend.com. Her style of teaching can benefit almost any level of practitioner with most any condition. Her experience and knowledge is vast and worth way more than what you pay for. If you would like a firsthand testimonial drop me a line. I’d be happy to share my personal experience with you.

On to day seven.

Fed Up!

2008-10-31T15:37:00.000-07:00

That's it! I'm fed up with the fat!

It's true, I'm officially chubby. Between working on two businesses and having a family, I have found myself unfortunately frumpy. Last Saturday I could take no more so I decided to try Take Shape For Life with Jenny Berg as my coach. Lucky for me, merely a week earlier, Jenny and her husband Steve decided to take an ad out in True North and thus I was introduced to the program.

Jenny is so positive and genuine that my interest was snagged right away. As someone who has had to learn a bit about sales, it takes more than ever these days to be convinced that a product or service is worth investing in. But talking to Jenny gave me just a little hope that the extra 30 pounds, that I have slowly gained ever since I had my first daughter, could potentially be shed in a doable amount of time.

It's not that I haven't already tried. I have. And I have lost weight. But it always comes back on when I miss an hour long workout and then fall into a bitter state of hopelessness because I realize I can't keep up the pace. Anyways, I'm sure you've heard this sad old story over and over so I will spare you the details. Let's just say that Take Shape for Life looked like a great option when I heard that all of the meals are provided (except 1) and that it didn't require hours in the gym. Even better, the weight comes off relatively fast.

So here is the low-down on Take Shape for Life. When you sign up you receive 5 weeks’ worth of food (approx $280). The food includes 5 medifast meals per day. You have to addone lean and green meal of your own (the rules for this meal are clearly outlined). You eat/drink every 2 to 3 hours and if you follow the rules you should lose 2 to 6 lbs a week.

This diet essentially depletes your body of simple carbs and forces it into a constant fat burning state. The first 3 to 4 days are supposed to be the hardest causing symptoms such as: fatigue, hunger, flatulence, irritability... I was definitely a bit nasty for those first few. And I have to admit, I had several moments when I wondered if I could handle it. But.....

I have lost 5.5 lbs in 5 days...so needless to say, I am happy.

Yesterday (day 4) I started to feel better and stabilize on the program. Today I am feeling great! My mornings seem to be the toughest times with moments of feeling "low blood sugary" and hungry. But in the afternoon I have found that I actually have a hard time remembering that it's time to eat...which is so very cool.
So now you are probably wondering "How does the food taste?" right? Well, I love the peanut butter bars but you can only have one a day. I also like the eggs...I think they taste pretty much like the real thing. The shakes are ok but a little grainy, and the pudding is pretty good too but it definitely tastes "healthy". So I guess what I'm trying to say is don't expect fine dining.

Look getting chubby took a long time and a lot of poor choices so to think that you can get thin by eating fabulous food every 2 hours is absurd. But so far this is doable.

I am a busy woman so I like "meals" that only require adding water and shaking or adding water and heating...very cool. I like that I know exactly what I need to eat for my lean and green...quick and easy. And I love seeing the difference every day! Every Flipping Day!
So I guess tomorrow will be a new day, and maybe I'll feel different but as for now I am just stoked that I only have to lose 24.5 pounds to be back to my pre-baby/pre-marriage weight! Now I can do that.

The Village Preschool Expands

2008-10-27T17:45:00.000-07:00

The Village Preschool is opening a second site in mid-November. The program will serve 2-6 year olds an offer the same great program including yoga for children. If you or someone you know is interested in finding out more about our program or reserving their child(ren) a spot, you can contact us by calling 541.306.3042 or dropping us a line at thevillagepreschool2@gmail.com.

Visit us online at www.thevillagepreschool.org!

Sincerely,

Annette Benedetti
Director
The Village Preschool

Voting for Maren

2008-10-20T11:30:00.000-07:00

I have been privileged enough to actually meet with one of the candidates running for State Senator 27th District and I have to say “I am impressed”. Maren Lundgren has been out hitting the streets and promoting her campaign over this last summer and fall, and we have crossed path several times. She manned a booth in the sweltering heat at Fiesta Del Sol, and got to know our communities children and their families at The Children’s Festival. Maybe this is one of the many reasons I like her. I believe that it is important to “show up”, support, and take part in your communities important events even if it is tough, tiring, or doesn’t yield the response you had hoped for. It was refreshing to see that someone who is asking for my vote actually “showed up” and ask for it in person..even in the sweltering heat.

And while I am impressed with her hard work and campaign efforts what really won me over is who she is and what she supports. After my talks with her I asked her to sum up the things we talked about. So here’s the run down on Maren and if this isn’t enough to win you over..well I don’t know what is:

Who is Maren?

As a mother and an advocate for children in my job as public defender (Juvenile Justice), I am frustrated when I find myself facing the same problems and fighting the same fight time and time again. What I have come to realize is that our system is broken. Whether we are talking about criminal justice, education, the environment, or public transportation, we have difficult choices to make. We have to change the way we think about the urgent problems we are facing and stop throwing increasingly larger piles of money at the same broken systems. Now is the time to collaborate and form a shared vision of the Oregon we want our children and grandchildren to inherit and set a strategic plan to reach that vision.

Prioritizing Education:

I am committed to increasing access to early childhood education so all our children arrive at school ready to learn. We need to reduce class sizes, and expand teacher mentoring programs, while keeping art, music, and PE in all of our schools so our children get the diverse education they need to excel in a global marketplace.

Lack of financial resources should not be a barrier to a student who wants to learn. We must work to ensure that all Oregonians have access to higher education and vocational programs to build a brighter future for our state.

Achieving Energy Independence:

As Oregonians we have the pioneering spirit to build on our renewable energy infrastructure. By expanding the use of existing wind, solar, wave and geothermal technology we can become the blueprint for the nation in achieving energy independence.

Expanding Public Transportation:

In these difficult economic times, with fuel prices rising and no end in sight, we must increase access to public transportation and ensure working families don’t have to choose between buying fuel and putting food on the table.

Improving Access to Healthcare:

Healthcare is a basic human right, not a privilege. No one should have to choose between paying for medical treatment and paying their bills, or have their conditions worsen because they lack access to affordable treatment. As a mother, I understand the urgency of this issue and I will fight to ensure every Oregonian has access to basic healthcare.

Protecting Our Natural Resources:

As a fourth generation Oregonian, I have long been an advocate of protecting our natural resources. Bio-diversity is essential to our farms, forests and fisheries and must be preserved for the future. I recognize the vital role the environment plays in the long term sustainability of our economy and recreation and will continue to dedicate myself to protecting the things we love about our great state.

This is just a quick synopsis of her passions and goals for Oregon and its residents, and clearly her stance speaks to me personally as a mother and early education provider. If you would like to find out more about Maren before filling out your ballot and sending it in, check out http://www.lundgrenforsenate.org/. I believe you will be inspired.

Now for my most important message… Vote! If you are like me, you have received your ballot and are ready to go.. So what are you waiting for? I am doing it. Right now..see?

Miss Carry

2008-10-06T17:10:00.000-07:00

What the hell is that supposed to mean anyways?

Mis Carry…mis carriage.

The words..the word made no sense to me. It wasn’t like I was carrying anything wrong, holding it upside down or backwards. It wasn’t like there were instructions I didn’t follow. In fact, I had been far more careful and deliberate about everything that went into my body during this pregnancy than I had during my past pregnancies with my daughters. This time I wanted to do everything perfectly as it would probably be the last time I would have the chance to. I went for a walk every day, I ate organic, no sugar, no caffeine, yoga almost every day.

I followed the flipping instructions!

I conceived on March 1st (I am fairly sure). 10 weeks later, while napping with my youngest I started to miscarry. I knew what it was the second I felt the twinge. All along I had felt like something was not quite right. I had told everyone, including my midwife, over and over. Everyone dismissed my concerns as paranoia.

During yoga I would chant “stay with me, please stay with me” in my mind. My own little mantra. But it did no good.

I wasn’t prepared. It happened on a Saturday, so I called the on-call doc and told him what was going on. He told me I could either go to the hospital or wait until Monday. It was up to me.

It was up to me….What the???

I went to the hospital.

After hours of waiting the doc came in and attempted to do a pelvic. He couldn’t find my cervix. The blood made everything difficult. Well, he didn’t tell me that but women know when the clamp is clamped.. and well, let’s just say “he failed to clamp.” Instead of telling me that he was unable to do what he had to do, he told me that my cervix was closed and all was probably ok. This was followed by a gush of blood that he tried to brush off as “nothing to worry about.”

The ultrasound disagreed with the doctor.

I went home with nothing and was told I could call my doctor on Monday and “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

No instructions, no insight into what was to come. I figured it would be like a heavy period that would last a couple of days.

Sunday I bled but felt ok until it was time for bed. That’s when it got rough. It reminded me of contractions. I cried, took lots of Ibuprophen, and eventually fell asleep. When I woke up the next morning I had officially “miscarried”. I guess that is what you would call it. No one had told me what it would be like. If I had known, I would have not gone to the bathroom.

I would have had something to bury, or burn. Something to say goodbye to. I needed to say goodbye to that little piece of me that I would never know.

We don’t talk about these things.

I don’t talk about it anymore. Now that the anguish is subsiding and the blame game has failed. I don’t talk about it anymore.

I don’t want have a baby and I don’t talk about it anymore.

Celebrate Peace Day on September 21st!

2008-09-12T20:07:00.000-07:00

No Laughing Matter

2008-09-05T10:54:00.000-07:00

I have worked in community and social services for most of my life... Is the work I have done a joke? Is it worth nothing? Does it not speak to my character, passions, and drive?

This goes out to all of the community and social workers out there who work for next to nothing to make a difference. Your work is no laughing matter and you are deeply appreciated.

The Girl Effect

2008-08-21T13:18:00.000-07:00

For my daughters,students, their daughters,and their daughters...

Back at home...well sorta

2008-07-18T10:19:00.000-07:00

Mom is out of the hospital and back at my sister's house. She is doing surprisingly well! It has been a wonderful learning experience for both me and my oldest daughter. Approaching the subject of sickness and death is sort of uncomfortable for me. When I was young, those subjects were kept hush, hush. And while I understand why,I think that the silence bred more fear than openness would have. This experience with my mother has allowed me to start talking to Phoenix about these types of events in life and I have been amazed at her response. She is very curious and compassionate. I learn a whole lot just from watching her deal with this new information and experience.

Here are some great photos of all of us with our buzzed heads and mom fresh out of the hospital and doing well.

Reagen, Mom, and Phoenix.

Phoenix and me!

Redefining Beauty

2008-07-15T22:53:00.000-07:00

So we just got back to Seattle from our annual Floating Woman gathering. We raised several hundred dollars which will go to help support our friend Cat as she faces her battle with breast cancer, and what she doesn’t need will go to support breast cancer research.

And while raising funds was very important, what we learned while we were there was inspiring. As I mentioned before the theme for this Floating Woman was “The bald and the beautiful”, as Cat has lost all of her hair and my mother may also be losing hers very soon. My sister, who is really talented at cutting hair decided to raise money by offering hair cuts for a small fee. The hitch was that the only hair styles she offered were the shave and the buzz cut which cost $5. There was also an “opt out” option that cost $20. So if you attended Floating Woman you had to do one or the other.

Cat kicked things off by shaving my younger sister Reagen’s head and as soon as she saw the finished product her eyes lit up and she said “You look so good!” Well Phoenix, my oldest daughter, loved her aunt’s hair so much that she begged to have her hair shaved down too. Before I knew it her hair was in heaps on the ground and to everyone’s amazement she appeared more beautiful than ever. Again, Cat gasped “She’s so beautiful.” At one point her eyes filled with tears as everyone lined up one at a time to relieve themselves of their hair and she said “I am just trying to process what’s happening right now.”

Within a couple of hours most everyone had shed their hair and the camp was filled with laughter. We were all truly amazed at how beautiful everyone looked. It was so interesting to actually see people without all of the hair to hide behind. And it was touching to see Cat slowly realize that yes, everyone, including her, still looked amazing without their hair. I loved that my daughters felt pretty without long locks of hair, I love that I feel beautiful without my ridiculously priced hair cut (that’s another story).

Tomorrow my mother will lose her breast at 4pm. She will still be a beautiful woman without it. Without her hair and without her breast, she will still be beautiful.

Another Benedetti Blog and Floating Woman Returns

2008-06-29T09:42:00.000-07:00

My mom has joined me in the blogging world. She is using her blog both therapeutically and as a way to keep loved ones informed as she begins her battle with cancer. If you would like to check it out or know someone who could benefit from her insights visithttp://www.dancinbenedettis.blogspot.com/.

Also, in case you are interested, the third annual Floating Woman gathering is about to take place. (Get it? Instead of Burning Man.. its Floating Woman...) All of the proceeds from our various events will either go to support our friend Kat as she faces her battle with breast cancer or to a breast cancer nonprofit of her choosing. To find out more about our annual event check out http://www.floatingwoman.com/.

At the end of next week my family will take off to join my parents for the 4th of July and then head up to Seattle to support my mother at her doc appointments, then we head to floating woman to spend time with 100 of our closest friends (and their closest friends, and their closest friends..) We will head back to Seattle on the 15th and my mother will have her mastectomy on the 16th. July is bound to be a roller coaster, but with the support of our good friends I know we can turn this experience into something positive.

Thankful

2008-06-20T22:00:00.000-07:00

Tonight I am thankful.

I am thankful for my mother who supports my dreams and encourages me to keep working on them even when I am tired and want to give up.

I am thankful for my partner, Sethi Jacobson, who works hard right beside me and reminds me why I am doing what I am.

I am thankful for my best friend, Amie Fisher, who loves me even after finding out about and having to deal with all my quirks and baggage.

I am thankful for my father, who has always protected me and makes sure I have what I need, even when it means sacrificing or putting himself in harm's way.

I am thankful for my "little" sister Reagen, who makes sure I remember how to laugh, have fun, and dork out, no matter how hard things get.

I am thankful for my older sister Winda who, without knowing it, has taught me how to work for what I really want.

I am thankful for my yoga teacher, Nadine Sims, who has taught me how to find peace and follow a path that will never lead me astray.

I am thankful for Phoenix, my oldest daughter, who saved my life.

I am thankful for Rain, my youngest daughter, whose embrace holds me together.

I am thankful for Eli, my soul sister, who reminds me to be true to myself (never ashamed).

I am thankful for The Village Preschool families, and for everyone who supports True North including the readership (and their amazingly sweet and sincere comments),the advertisers (who are all amazing people working from their hearts and souls to serve the community), Jane Johnson (my incredible director of art/graphic designer), and Erin, Stacey, and Mindi(sales reps). I can't even express how touched I am by the support all of these people provide. It is truly mind blowing.

And I am oh, so thankful for my husband,James, who has taught me what being in love is all about.

Things are hard right now. There is no getting around it. Things are hard and frightening. But in those quiet moments, that scare me the most, remembering all that I have to be thankful for sooths me. Much like I sooth my children when they wake from a midnight's bad dream.

Silence

2008-06-04T21:12:00.000-07:00

Not 20 minutes ago I found out that my mother has breast cancer...

I don't know what to say.

It's so quiet here.

Do You Game!

2008-05-29T17:59:00.000-07:00

Alright, I have to admit, I rarely play video games. Not so much because I don't want to, more because if I start, I won't stop and then who will feed and take care of the children.

I did, however, buy my husband a Wii for Christmas. It is, of course, carefully hidden from the children and is only taken out after the sun has gone down and they are sleeping peacefully in their beds. Once that has been accomplished then the fun begins. Nightly, I find my husband killing zombies, bowling, boxing, or playing tennis.

Before we bought the Wii we were completely out of the gaming loop. For us gaming meant "Ring Around the Rosies" and "Hide and Seek". Fortunately, when I went to purchase the game system I had the perfect person to turn to for a quick "fill in" on the most popular and best games out there.. my big sis.

She is oh so cool and has a job that millions of zit faced adolescents would kill for, she writes video game reviews for MSNBC. That's right, she spends her days playing video games and then giving the rest of us the low-down so that we don't waste our cash on lame games.

So if you do game, and you want to read some reliable reviews check her column out online.

A little note from my sis:

Those of you interested in independent and casual games might be interested. Check it out at:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24862411/
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24862861/

From my column and the associated Top 5 list, I highly recommend "Samorost 2" (if you like point-and-click adventure games). I believe "World of Goo" is well worth the $20 bucks (you get the first chapter now and the entire game as soon as it launches) and "Audiosurf" is also worth the $10. I also found "Coil" (free) to be awesomely odd.

___________________

A final note: My sister is a fellow mom of an amazing one year old little boy. Way to make a living from home ehh... Ah livin the life.

Your advice is actually wanted!

2008-05-29T16:44:00.000-07:00

As you all know, I launched True North at the beginning of this year. And what an exciting year this has been. The Central Oregon parenting community has really embraced our new publication and we are so pleased. Now we want to give local parents the opportunity to share their knowledge with eachother. See below!

_____________________________________

We know that some of the best parenting advice comes from parents. That’s right! There’s no one better to turn to in difficult times than those who are on the actual front lines learning how to hold it together during the difficult phases all children (an parents) go through. Here is your opportunity to share some of the solutions you have come up with, with the rest of our community. Read the questions below and if you have some words of wisdom, advice, or personal stories you’d like to share, send them to info@truenorthparnting.com and write “If you ask me…” in the subject line:

How do you ease your children out of summer and back into the school routine? Do you have tips on the first day of preschool? Kindergarten? First grade? How about Jr. High and High school? We’d love to hear what works for your family and keep the kids from groaning as school days grow near.

How do you keep the love alive? Let’s face it, with kids, jobs, chores, and all the daily stresses that go along with raising a family…well it can be a little challenging to keep the flame a burnin’ in a relationship. Do you have favorite places you get out to? What do you do when the funds are tight or you can’t find a sitter? Whatever you do, on the cheap, expensive and chic, we’d like to know!

Please note that while all submitted e-mails may be published in both the True North print and online publications, publication is not guaranteed.

True North Launches!

2008-01-17T21:23:00.000-08:00

As many of you already know, my partner Nicole Oliver and I have been working tirelessly for the last couple of months on launching Central Oregon's first online parenting magazine, True North. Our launch date was the 15th of this month, and believe it or not, it was up by 11:59PM last night!

We are so pleased with the site and eager to share it with everyone we know as well as all of the parents and grandparents residing in Central Oregon. Please note that the local directory and calendar of events are a work in progress. There is so much to post in both of these areas that my partner is compiling information on all of the local businesses and events, double checking the facts, phone numbers, and links and sending them off in large batches. Over the next couple of months you will see both the directory and calendar grow to become Central Oregon's single most in depth resource for local parents.

If you like what you see after checking True North out at http://www.truenort hparenting. com/index. php please pass the link along to anyone you know who might enjoy or benefit from it. Also, we would appreciate any and all feedback on the site and what we can do to enhance and improve the quality of the content and/or the usability of the site.

Finally keep your eye out. True North will be going to print in April of this year. We will be passing along more information about our print issues as the time draws nearer. Take care and enjoy!

Sincerely,

Annette Benedetti
............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ..
True North
Chart your own course.
annette@truenorthpa renting.com
www.truenorthparenting.com
541.728.0332
............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ..

When a little magic goes a long way.

2007-12-17T23:06:00.000-08:00

My oldest daughter is about to lose her first tooth. Everyday she wiggles it with excitement and fantasizes about what the tooth fairy will be bringing her. She, of course, is sure that some magical fairy dust will be left behind for her to use, after all, her little girlfriend at school swears she got some.

So, today my business partner and I stopped by Bambini of Bend while we were out handing out our True North advertising packets. If you haven’t checked this store out yet you absolutely should. It’s filled with unique toys and beautiful clothing items for young children. Anyways, I happened to see a little blue silk tooth fairy pillow while browsing the isles. It is made out of blue silk with pretty little fairy on the front and a small pocket sewn on the back, and it fits right in the palm of my hand. It is also lightly scented with lavender. The moment I saw it I knew my daughter would fall in love with it so I bought it and brought it home.

Right before bed I told my daughter I had a special gift for her but that she couldn’t use it until her tooth came out. Oh how big her eyes got when I took out the pillow. I told her that it was a magic pillow and that the lavender was meant to specifically attract her tooth fairy. I told her how the tooth fairy would be able to track it down once her tooth was placed in the pocket just by the scent. She asked if she could hold it and I let her but I told her it would have to stay in my drawer until her tooth finally came out.

She gave me the biggest hugs and told me how much she loved her pillow as we walked all the way up the stairs and in to my bedroom. As I tucked the pillow into my drawer my daughter turned to me and said “When I grow up and have my own little girl, and when she turns five and starts to lose her tooth, I will give that special pillow to her.” Then she gave me a big hug and told me I was the best mom in the whole world.

I gave my daughter a big hug and took her into the bathroom where she let out a little sob and said “Oh mama, I’m a little sad because I am so happy. I am so happy you gave me that pillow that it makes me a little sad.” Then she gave me another big hug and a smile.

My little girl is losing her very first tooth. One of the ones I eagerly counted as they came in. What’s even more important is that she is learning the depth and breadth of her love and what it means to be thankful.

I’m so happy that it makes me just a little bit sad.

This is what happens when...

2007-12-09T20:50:00.000-08:00

you go hunting for a Christmas tree in the dark.

What I have learned...

Lodgepole pines are good for building furniture,
not making Christmas trees.

By the way....

We were looking for a fir tree...not a lodge pole pine...

A fir tree.

The Man Cold

2007-12-06T21:41:00.000-08:00

A good friend of mine and fellow blogger (Earth Mom)sent me this. Sooooo funny. What woman can't relate?

The Man Cold. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mz6DktXFvg4

Odd

2007-12-02T23:09:00.000-08:00

I didn’t have a sweet tooth before I met my husband. I almost never had dessert. Then he came into my life and brought chocolate and ice cream. It became our favorite part of date nights and romantic rendezvous.

I have never been in as good of shape as I was before I met my husband. In fact, I have been consistently 15 lbs heavier.

So every month or two I make him vow not to bring sweets into the house. I work out like crazy and bounce down about 5 to 7 lbs. In general, James has been fairly good about keeping things healthy for my sake. He doesn’t really have to worry about his own physique. Years of hard labor and a love for the outdoors keep him from getting soft. Sooo aggravating.

Anyways, tonight James produced a couple of chocolate covered cherries from seemingly out of nowhere (they are my favorite). Any self restraint I might have otherwise had snapped and I begged him to tell me where the box was.

He wouldn’t of course.

It made me mad… and frustrated. I tried to throw a fit and tell him that he was being insulting. But he wouldn’t budge. I even tried to spy on him to find out where they were hidden. But he caught me every time.

Then just about 10 minutes ago, while he was working out in the shop, I went through the whole kitchen and found his stash. And jeeze oh flip, does he ever have a stash. I’m talking a huge box of chocolate covered cherries and several chocolate bars. They were hidden in a drawer I never look in.

My instant reaction was one of several conflicting feelings at once:

Joy – because I am in the mood to dive into chocolate and I don’t have to run out into the blizzard that is currently raging to get some.

Anger- he is supposed to be supporting me in my fight against the extra fat he brought into my life.

Shame- maybe I shouldn’t let him know I found the stash so that I can sneak some whenever I want.

Concern- how long has this been going on behind my back. After all what kind of a marriage do we have if he has been keeping secrets from me.

Any advice on how to handle this situation? I guess I’ll just have to take some time to think things over while I take a bath and eat some of those delicious chocolate covered cherries.

38 Degrees (Our New Favorite Family Restaurant)

2007-11-30T22:15:00.000-08:00

It’s the end of a week spent playing, teaching, cleaning, potty training, and running after 30 plus children 10 and a half hours a day (not to mention the evening hours with my own). Tonight as the door closed behind the last child and their parent, James and I sighed and then cringed at the thought of making dinner.

We both decided we wanted to eat out. Eating out with kids is tricky for us. We spend sooo much time with children all week the last thing we want to do is go to Red Robin and join the masses of parents eating out with their kids. It’s so loud and over stimulating, and though our girls love to go, I break into a cold sweat at the thought of it.

Luckily, a few weeks ago a friend recommended 38 degrees when I asked her for a recommendation on a nearby family friendly restaurant. We were leaving her son’s birthday party and they lived only a few blocks away. When we first walked up to the door dressed in jeans and toting our sugared up children we thought our friends had been mistaken. Peering in the window the restaurant had a Spa-like feel to it with beautiful stone work, dimmed lighting, and calming fans to keep the air moving and fresh. The menu looked amazing, upper end but yummy. We immediately turned to head back to the car.

Before we made it 4 steps the host poked his head out the door and asked us if we needed any help. We told him that we’d love to stay but we didn’t want to disturb anyone with the kids. He laughed and told us to come on in and that they even had a children’s menu. Well, what could we say? I mean he stepped out into the wintery night to invite us in!

Once inside we were sat at a nice table for four with some soft seasonal music playing in the background, and get this … they had sippy cups! Can you believe it? Sippy cups! How cool is that? This took 90% of the stress out of eating out right away, and strangely, my kids mellowed out almost immediately. It seems that the relaxing atmosphere they are attempting to create is a huge success, even with the kids. The entire night was wonderful. The food was amazing, the service was incredible and the kids were happy and well behaved.

So tonight we decided that we’d give 30 degrees another shot. James warned me that I had set high standards for the restaurant and not to expect it to be quite as good. After all such a pleasant eating experience with 2 young children must be a fluke right?

Wrong!

Tonight was even more amazing! The lasagna that I had was divine and James loved his dish too. The lulling effect was even more pronounced. The girls were cuddly and relaxed and enjoyed the appetizers, bread, their meals, and desert without even one unpleasant outburst. Our waitress was perfect. She even remembered us from our previous visit. She was polite and returned just often enough to meet our needs without interrupting our family time.

James had a glass of sangria, which was yummy and festive. I had a pear wine that took the last bit of tension out of my body and warmed me from head to toe. And desert was just the way to top off the perfect evening out with the girls.

Even our oldest daughter went on and on about how she loved her food and wanted to come back every Friday night. Ok, so it might be a little too expensive for every Friday night but it will certainly be a regular spot for us to go as a family, or on a date night.

It’s so nice to finally find a family friendly restaurant that can allow the adults to feel adult and the children to enjoy themselves with out being bombarded by loud noises, video games and television.

Check out Bend Oregon Restaurants blog to get some more input on eating out at 38 degrees.

Thoughts from the city.

2007-11-26T12:51:00.000-08:00

We are finally home. Our trip to Seattle was all we hoped; friends, family and a lot of food and rest. It was so exciting to see the girls enjoy their aunts and soak in the city life. I was raised in a very small town in Idaho and never had the opportunity to experience the diverse nature of a big city. And what I realize, after this brief vacation, is that though I am grateful to be raising my children in a small town that offers the elements of safety and security that are absent in a city; I am also thankful that I am able to expose my children to a larger community that includes peoples from all walks of life. I love that they have no problem integrating all types of people into their concept of “normal” and that unlike me (as a small child), they don’t gasp and stare when someone of a different race or with different clothing and hair walk by. I love that they realize that beauty comes in all shades, shapes, and sizes.

I have so much to be thankful for.

Thankful

2007-11-22T10:48:00.000-08:00

I have two beautiful daugters and an amazing husband.
They are my home.

They watch me closely as I frantically work on pushing our businesses towards success.
And when I am tired and unsure I feel them wrap around me,

and nothing else matters.

True North Parenting Submission Guidelines

2007-11-18T16:40:00.000-08:00

Check out the new True North blog. It will keep you up to date on the magazine’s development. If you are interested in writing for us feel free to check out the submission guidelines as well!

A Late Night at the Village.

2007-11-16T19:25:00.000-08:00

Tonight The Village Preschool had a special, Thanksgiving Parent's Night Out. I have come to love these extended days. The kids get so excited about their late night party that they get along better than siblings. Usually we all make pizza together and then curl up on the couch and nap mats for a movie. Tonight we had a Thanksgiving feast, and then I let my heart melt as tiny heads rested on tiny shoulders and all nestled in for the night.

What a wonderful Village...
What a wonderful family...

Sleeping under the stars!

2007-11-15T22:53:00.000-08:00

I actually have one of these murals in my girl’s room. It’s awesome and my daughters love it. They even get excited about going to bed…. Who would’ve thought?

Dear Annette,

As editor of "Mom's 2 Mom", and owner of Village Pre School I wanted to make you aware of my business here in Bend that is great for children and Mom's. Please feel free to pass this information along to other Mom's.

How many times do Mom's hear their kids say "I wanna go to bed". That's right, they enjoy bedtime, sleep better, longer, with less fear of the dark and fewer night terror issues. That's worth it's weight in gold isn't it.

I'm an artist that works with people that have insomnia, anxiety, nightmares, are stressed out, and can't find the time to work into their busy schedules, time for relaxation. Children get stressed too and suffer some of these same issues as adults.

Who doesn't have fond memories of times past, sleeping outside under the stars. Remember how relaxed you felt?The serene and tranquil night sky let you gently drift off to sleep. My artistic murals recreate that experience. It's like having a glass ceiling over your bed.

Each 3 dimensional glow in the dark mural that I paint by hand is an original piece of art. It's so astronomically accurate that it's educational as well. Children learn the constellations and it's something the whole family can enjoy together. It creates a very soft glow all night. Those night lights become a thing of the past. The high quality paint I use is ton toxic and odor free. It's invisible over light colored paint during the day.

Try it with your own children and see how YOU can now have a restful nights sleep as well.

Cheryl Hunt SAI
Celestial Escapes
www.CelestialEscapes.com
(541) 977-STAR (7827)

"Let me bring the night sky to you"

The Little Rumpus Room

2007-11-12T15:06:00.000-08:00

FYI I received this e-mail just last night.

Hello everyone,

I hope this email finds you well.

I wanted to take this opportunity to announce that Little Rumpus Room will be opening its doors in December.

Gloria and I are once again teaming up to bring you our sister campus at
2403 Quinn Creek Loop, on Bend's westside

Little Rumpus Room will house infants and toddlers, ranging from 6 weeks to 23 months. Our maximum group size will be 8, with a 3 to 1 ratio for non-mobiles and a 4 to 1 ratio for mobile infants.

We will be temporarily certifying this location as our common goal for both campuses is to move to a commercial and permanent location within the next two years.

We know that some of you have been with us for quite a while and some recall us going through a bit of a journey to get here. We want all of you to know that this has been a worthwhile journey and very proud of its outcomes.

Little Rumpus Room will be a blended Montessori, Reggio and Waldorf influenced program. We will provide healthy snacks for our toddlers and primary care-giving for all groups. We will be offering the same high quality programming you have grown to love in our sister campus, Rumpus Room Creative Arts Preschool and High Desert Nannies.

To help serve our area families, Little Rumpus Room will offer both full and part time care for full or half days.

Please join us in celebrating our opening by visiting our website at:
http://web.mac.com/theboardz/iWeb/LittleRumpusRoom

Tours of our facility will begin the week of November 19th, with anticipated enrollment to start December 3rd, 2007.

If you’d like more information or if you know if anyone that is interested in enrollment, please have them contact us at (541) 408-2304 or email us at rumpusroom@bendcable.com

Thanks for your continued support and for spreading the word!
--
Jenny Board
Owner, Rumpus Time, LLC

Chair, ECDEB
ECE Consultant; Master Trainer, Oregon Registry
541-408-2304
rumpusroom@bendcable.com
www.rumpusroomschool.com; http://web.mac.com/theboardz/iWeb/HighDesertNannies; http://web.mac.com/theboardz/iWeb/LittleRumpusRoom

Need urgent info on mothers/families without healthcare for kids

2007-11-11T00:36:00.000-08:00

I received this e-mail earlier today. This topic is very important and I urge anyone who has a story to share to contact Anna right away. You can contact her at adukehar@uoregon.edu.

Hi Annette,

I am a student journalist working on an article about the bill President Bush just vetoed and how mother's without health insurance for their children are affected. I came across your site MOM2MOM Bend, Oregon, and I was hoping you either had your own personal story with dealing with this kind of issue, or you knew someone i could talk to. I am just looking for some anecdotes that illustrate how families who may not earn enough income to pay for health insurance for their children are feeling about this.

Thanks so much and I look forward to hearing back from you as soon as possible!

Anna Dukehart
University of Oregon
School of Journalism and Communication

Announcing the Launch of True North Parenting!

2007-11-08T23:22:00.000-08:00

As a parent I am constantly searching for ways to improve my family’s life. Between sifting through information about popular parenting philosophies and scouring newspapers to find information on local activities and events, I barely have any spare time to spend with my family.

Constantly confronted with this dilemma, the inevitable happened. Yes! I have joined forces with another amazing mother to bring together all of the information and resources that local parents are looking for. This January we will be launching True North! (www.truenorthparenting.com)

What is True North?
True North is a new online parenting magazine for Central Oregon families. Our goal is to provide local parents with the information and resources they need to navigate through the choices of family life. We will be your personal link to local events, family activities, educational resources, and the Central Oregon parenting community. We will give you the information you need to find your own parenting true North. Our new site will launch in January 2008
www.truenorthparenting.com

True North Parenting. Chart your own course.

Article Submissions:
True North is not only welcoming, but encouraging unsolicited articles and personal essays that are in line with our publication’s philosophy and goals. To receive a copy of our submission guidelines and to find out more drop us a line at info@truenorthparenting.com.

Free Gigglybops Event!

2007-09-21T07:37:00.000-07:00

FALL PICNIC

Saturday, Sep 22 10a.m.–3p.m.

Pony Rides 11a.m. – 1p.m.

Come join Gigglybops in bidding farewell to the summer and welcoming the Fall.

-Music
-Hay Maze
-Inflatable Castle
-Events and prizes

Admission to Gigglybops will be free – see our website www.gigglybops.com for a schedule and more information.

( or call 585-1076 )

International Day of Peace

2007-09-17T21:34:00.000-07:00

One of my parents just sent me this info. If I am not too exhausted at the end of the week I will try my best to make it. After all, don't we all want peace for our children?

Sept. 21, International Day of Peace

We have an opportunity to unite with the International Community, to raise our voices for Peace. Jane Goodall, one of the United Nations Ambassador’s for Peace, has the dream of flying homemade Peace Doves around the world so they can be seen circling the globe from space.
We would like to circle the downtown area of Bend with Peace Doves and Peace Signs and Peace Loving People

September is a very crucial month of decision making for congress.
If you’ve never come out to demonstrate before, come out Now!!

Sept. 21, 5:00 Peace Rally Starting at Brandis Square

6:00 P.M. Meet in Drake Park for Food and Fellowship

7:00 P.M. Walk to The Environmental Center to hear
Goudarz Eghtedari, a Middle East expert from Iran
Speaking for Amnesty International

Every Child Should Be Insured!

2007-08-25T18:18:00.001-07:00

Please take a moment to read this and get educated on SCHIP. I urge everyone to follow the link below and let congress know that we won’t stand for any child to go without health insurance. We must stand up together and insist that ALL children be protected and taken care of equally.
Sincerely,
Annette_

__________________________

Imagine being told you couldn't take your child to the doctor for a full year. What might happen if your child got strep throat and had to go without medical attention for months and months?

This sad scenario will be a reality for many U.S. families if the rules aren't fixed: Under new rules, made by the President, some children who depend on lower-cost health care coverage will have to wait a full year--with no insurance at all--to qualify for help. This outrageous requirement is part of a slate of changes made to limit the number of children who can benefit from the lower-cost health care coverage of the State Children's Health Insurance Program (SCHIP). We can't believe that in a country where 1 in 9 children go without any health care coverage at all, there is any thought of more limits. This senseless rules change is especially surprising because SCHIP is supported by Democrats and Republicans alike.

Everyone, it seems, except for the President, sees the value in giving kids healthcare. Let's send a strong message together.

TELL CONGRESS THAT KIDS CAN'T WAIT FOR HEALTHCARE BY GOING TO THIS LINK: http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/momsrising/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=12417

When Congress returns from its recess in September, it will take up funding for the State Children's Health Insurance Program again. Tell your representatives that they must reverse these new and backward-thinking rules (described below), and fully fund the program.
THE SCOOP ON SCHIP: This federal health care program (one of our favorites!) helps families afford health coverage for their children (and this help is critically important because right now 1 in 9 children are without health care coverage at all!). Here's how it works--it gives funds to the 50 States, who then use the money to create health care coverage programs for kids. Families that don't meet the low-income standards for Medicaid coverage, but still don't make enough to purchase private insurance, can apply for their children to be covered by the state-run plans.

What makes this program so powerful is that it allows states to decide what level of assistance makes sense for their populations--taking into account the state economy, local cost of living, and the total number of uninsured children in their state.

ABOUT THAT 1-YEAR WAIT FOR THE DOCTOR: Sadly, the just released rules undermine a state's ability to administer their program in the best way -- helping the most kids get much needed health coverage. These problematic changes include the following:
* Requiring a 1-year waiting period--with no insurance at all--for some children before they can be covered;

* Pushing states to only cover children whose families are at 250% of the federal poverty level, regardless of the cost of living in that state;

* Tying children's health coverage to private insurance enrollment rates: if private insurance enrollment is down in a state (for any reason), then the federal government won't cover more kids. This just plain doesn't make sense-particularly because private insurance enrollment is often tied to a job so there could be a scenario where unemployment would go up, but help for kids' health care would go down!

As a part of a nation-wide, bi-partisan effort, we've been working long and hard to re-authorize SCHIP this year. MomsRising members have already sent over 30,000 emailed letters to Congress urging them to fully fund this essential federal program. Now, these new administrative rules threaten to undermine that hard work. Let's tell Congress to stop the madness.

TELL YOUR FRIENDS, DON'T LET THE SCHIP GO DOWN: Forward this email to all your loved ones. Let's make sure that kids can go to the doctor when they're sick, regardless of their families' ability to pay.

*Don't forget to email Congress now to tell them all children need health care coverage:
http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/momsrising/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=12417
Best --Katie, Kristin, Donna, Nanette, Joan, and the MomsRising Team

P.S. Want to know how SCHIP works in your state and see if you might be eligible? Check out this great resource from PBS: http://www.pbs.org/newshour/indepth_coverage/health/uninsured/statebystate_children_flash.html

P.P.S. BELOW YOU'LL FIND ARTICLES & RESOURCES ABOUT THIS ISSSUE:
- Administration's letter to health officials: http://www.cms.hhs.gov/smdl/downloads/SHO081707.pdf

- New York Times: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/08/22/health/policy/22insure.html?_r=1&hp&oref=slogin and http://www.nytimes.com/2007/08/21/washington/21health.html?em&ex=1187841600&en=af37007e15249f06&ei=5087%0A

- Seattle PI: http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/opinion/328490_schiped.html

- PBS: http://www.pbs.org/newshour/updates/health/july-dec07/schip_08-21.html

- Fox: http://www.foxnews.com/wires/2007Aug20/0,4670,ChildrenapossInsurance,00.html

An E-mail From Baby Boot Camp

2007-08-05T21:28:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to share this really great e-mail I received earlier this week. This program sounds great. Also please take note of the Grand Opening Celebration coming up!!! Very Cool!

Hi Annette,

I love your blog! Its fun to read about another mom's experiences and I hope your preschool does really well. We are just starting to think about preschool for our 2 year old-- so, I'm paying close attention!

I also wanted to introduce myself as the owner of Baby Boot Camp Central Oregon. I wanted to make sure this program was brought to your attention as your blog grows as a local mom resource. Baby Boot Camp classes are for both mom and baby and combine strength training drills with cardiovascular intervals. We emphasize core strength and stability and Personalized Fitness throughout the class. We started classes in July and its been such an honor-- not to mention fun- to meet Central Oregon moms and help them discover a program where they can be outside with their baby, meet other mom's and be getting fit at the same time! So far mom's love not having to find a sitter, or put their little one in child care-- not to mention the personalized attention that comes with a Baby Boot Camp class.

I thought the Baby Boot Camp web site may be a great link for mom's looking to stay fit-- under your "useful links" section. You have my permission to link to the site-- if you agree mom's would find it valuable: www.babybootcamp.com.

One additional note is that we're holding our Grand Opening celebration (though classes are already running!) on Saturday, August 11th. There will be food, goodie bags and a free raffle with prizes from local businesses. If your able- please come out with your family! On this special day class size is not limited and we'll be out to have fun and do a free class demo for all.

I'm happy to answer any questions you may have-- and again- thanks for your blog. Bend has needed something like this!

Warm Regards,

Mandy

Mandy Knotts
541-306-7452
mandy.knotts@babybootcamp.com
Baby Boot Camp Central Oregon

www.babybootcamp.com
Bring Your Baby. Get Fit(TM)

Please note that there celebration starts at 9 am and will include a free demo class, as well!

The Village Preschool’s Opening Day

2007-08-01T19:55:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to take a quick moment to comment on our opening day.

Today was fantastic! We had a small group of kids, which turned out to be perfect. We were able to get our bearings and figure out what was going to work and what wasn’t. The kids were all great.

One little girl had never been in preschool before and started off really sad. She cried for quite a while and just when I thought she might not sort things out for the day, James stepped in and gave her a great big hug and reassured her calmly. The next thing I knew she was outside playing in the sandbox and having a great time.

We managed to accomplish all of the activities we had hoped for including: baking muffins, pretend camping (in a tent), yoga, play dough, stories, and songs. We were pretty proud of ourselves at the end of the day and surprisingly energized.

I can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings.

By the way, I can’t say enough good things about the families that have enrolled with us thus far. Very cool people.

More Toy Recalls

2007-08-01T19:45:00.000-07:00

My sister sent me this message earlier today:

Hey guys,

Some more toys made in China have been recalled (lead in the paint)...including some Dora stuff.

Here's a link to everything that was recalled today:

http://service.mattel.com/us/recall/39054_IVR.asp?prod=52430

Thought you might want to know in case you had any of these items.

Check out the link to find out more!

The Cascade Children’s Festival

2007-07-25T21:22:00.000-07:00

We had an amazing time!

I have to admit, when we first got to the festival and set up our tiny little "The Village Preschool" tent, with our home made activities and hand outs, and then looked around us at all of the amazing activities that other organizations were putting on…well, we were a little worried.

We decided to think of ourselves as “The Little Tent That Could”.

For the whole hour before the festival started I imagined spending the next 6 hours watching children run by our tent straight for the bouncy house or face painting but amazingly enough, within minutes of opening, our play-dough table and water table were both filled with kids happily playing. Most of the children stayed and played for at least 10 minutes at a time and there were only two 5 minute periods of time when both tables were empty giving me a chance to recharge. Fortunately, the event gave me the opportunity to meet lots of really cool parents living here in bend, and our booth’s popularity reassured me that I still know what little ones love to do.

Several of the families came back to our tent more than once through out the day. It was so much fun! It was great to find out more about what our local parents are looking for in a preschool. Everyone was eager to contribute their thoughts and ideas and I will definitely remember the conversations I had with both mothers and fathers that day as I plan future activities and the weekly curriculum.

We will absolutely be heading back to the festival next year.

For now, we are turning our attention to our opening day, August 1st. We are so excited and thankful for all of the support we have received from local families as well as some wonderful providers in the area. We already have some really cool families and children enrolled and feel extra optimistic about the upcoming months.

Playskool Sippy Cups Pose Choking Hazard To Young Children

2007-07-21T18:23:00.000-07:00

Check out the link below for more info.

Playskool choking hazard

Mice at the Old Mill Cinemas????

2007-07-20T17:30:00.000-07:00

I love going to the movies!!! No really… I love the movies. So I was pretty freaked out when I received the famous “mouse feces in popcorn” e-mail. First I freaked out because my husband and I had literally gone to the movies the day before and had, of course, eaten gobs of popcorn. Then I freaked out because “holy !#*! what will we do if they shut the theatre down!” After all, it is just down the road from us.

Well, I have to admit after I took a few deep breaths and gave it some thought I found myself a little skeptical about the e-mail. It sounded like there was some truth to it… but like there was also a bit of exaggeration. My gut told me that some in house gossip and an unhappy employee might have mixed and created a tangent that was at least a little over done. Thus I decided to wait and find out what the Bulletin Reporter (who jumped right on the story) uncovered. Here is the link to what she wrote: “mice in the popcorn”.

I have to admit. I’m still a little grossed out. I’m disappointed that there is as much truth to it as there is, however, I do believe the now infamous e-mail was a bit over dramatic. The bottom line is that I’m still going to go to the movies at the Old Mill…but I won’t be eating the popcorn (it’s never been that good anyways).

I hope you will all take the time to read this report and then make your own decisions. Maybe we’ll all save a bit of money on our nights out to the movie now that we will think twice about buying the overpriced popcorn. Not much of a loss in my opinion.

The Village Preschool joins COBRA'S 19th Annual Cascade Children’s Festival

2007-07-19T15:11:00.000-07:00

Saturday the 21st from 9 AM until 4 PM the Cascade Children’s Festival will get underway down town in Drake Park. This is an annual event put on by COBRA (Central Oregon Battering & Rape Alliance). “The Festival is one of the primary fundraising activities of COBRA, which provides comprehensive domestic violence and sexual assault services and promotes the value of living life free from violence. The organization has a 24-bed emergency shelter in Bend and counseling offices in Redmond, Madras, Prineville and Sisters, with administrative offices in Bend.”
The festival includes many fun events for children including the stuffed animal corral and fishing booth, face painting, hat making, beanbag toss, dancing, soccer, frog pond, coloring contest, food, music, and entertainment.

And this year just as we are on the brink of opening our doors for the first time, The Village Preschool will be joining in the festivities. We are so excited to be part of this festival and knowing that all of the proceeds go to such a wonderful organization fills our hearts with joy. Our booth that will include water and play dough tables along with information on our program.

For the next two days James, the girls, and I will be working hard making tons of play dough for kids to play with as well as take home. We are all excited to have this opportunity to contribute to and take part in such and important community activity and we hope that you will all come down to join in the fun and get to know us personally.

Building it up.

2007-07-02T20:53:00.000-07:00

Turning my house into a preschool has been a fantastic experience so far. My husband and I spent the last week turning the lower level of our house into The Village Preschool. We moved all of our home furniture up to the second floor of the house, went shopping for supplies, and attacked the task of making our very own preschool furniture. That’s right! We spent hours side by side sawing, hammering, sanding, and painting to create our own cubbies and child sized table and benches. In my entire life, I had never used a power tool, and now I’m addicted! Who would have known that I could become a carpenter?

How satisfying to sit down at the end of the week and see the houses amazing transformation from an adult home into a child’s playing and learning center. I am so excited to share my home with little ones and their families. We started tours today and they have gone wonderfully so far. I can tell already that we have made the right choice for our family as well as our community. I can’t wait to see what happens next!

Salmonella and Veggi Booty Recall!

2007-06-29T09:35:00.000-07:00

June 28, 2007: Veggie Booty Snack Food Recalled After 51 Reported Cases of
Salmonella. All Veggie Booty snack foods are being recalled nationwide after 51 cases of
Salmonella food poisoning were reported in 17 states. The illness has mainly
struck children under the age of 3, according to the Food and Drug
Administration (FDA).

The recall was initiated by Robert's American Gourmet Food Inc.,
manufacturer of Veggie Booty, after the company was informed by the FDA of
possible Salmonella contamination of their product. According to the FDA,
many of those taken ill had consumed Veggie Booty.

Georgine Hertzwig of Robert's American Gourmet, based in Sea Cliff, NY, said
that the product had not tested positive for Salmonella, but that the recall
had been undertaken as a precaution given the FDA findings.

Veggie Booty is sold in many grocery outlets, including supermarkets and
health food stores, throughout the U.S. and Canada. It is also available
on-line and by mail order. All bag sizes, codes and expiration dates are
subject to the recall.

Symptoms of Salmonella food poisoning include diarrhea (sometimes bloody),
abdominal cramps, nausea, vomiting, fever, chills, headache, muscle pain,
and joint pain.

The Village Preschool!

2007-06-28T17:14:00.000-07:00

So I’ve done it now!

After mulling over the idea for several months, I have decided to open a preschool in my home. At the first of last month my family and I moved to a huge house in the SW neighborhood of Bend. Not quite sure of what to do with all our extra space and on the brink of starting a new job (which would require even more child care for my two daughters); it occurred to me that I have the education, experience, motivation, AND space required to start a preschool.

With the belief that the community must come together to support our families in order for children learn and grow in a healthy, happy, and socially responsible way, my husband and I have started The Village Preschool. After having a long talk with the State Certifier I have also decided to become certified as opposed to registered which means my facilities and my program will be held to higher standards.

I am excited to have this opportunity to create a program that will help fill a huge need in our community. For more information on my preschool program, mission, and philosophy you can check out our Web site at http://thevillagepreschool.org.

We have 3 immediate fulltime openings available (or multiple part-time openings). Once we are fully certified (at the end of July) we will have additional openings. We are currently setting up tours for next week.

Keepin the Love Alive.

2007-06-15T12:50:00.000-07:00

For the last two weeks my life has been turned upside-down. Due to unforeseen circumstances we had to make a quick move to a new home and a huge project came up at the last minute and had to be completed during the week of our move. The truth is, shortly after finding out that we had to move, I realized that there was no way I could balance working, moving, and giving my children the attention that they needed. So for the first time since I have had children, I waved goodbye to them and sent them off to their Nanna and Poppy’s house.

A week apart from my babies was a real eye opener for me and my husband. The first two days alone together were nearly awkward. We barely knew how to function without our children distracting and making demands of us. In fact it wasn’t until the last couple of days that we were really able to get into each other and just enjoy being a childless couple.

The last three or four days were great. I was able to look at my husband much like I had the first time I met him. We were able to be playful and lighthearted with each other and reflect openly on some of the things that had put a damper on our excitement for one and other, and the four hour drive to pick up the kids was the best drive I can remember having with James. We talked and laughed and told and retold stories all the way up to my parent’s driveway. Once there we made a commitment to pay more attention to each other and keep the fire, at the very least, smoldering.

So how has it been since the children have been back? Well, to be honest, it has been pretty challenging to keep to our commitment, but we ARE working on it. I’d love to know what other moms are doing to either improve or keep their relationships with their partners healthy. Do you take personal time away from the children? Is one night out a month enough to keep the spark alive?

Thomas the Train and Lead Poisoning.

2007-06-15T12:33:00.000-07:00

FYI, I have this train set.

Dear MomsRising member,

We heard from outraged young moms, grandmas, pre-schools, and our own team members about one thing yesterday: Toxic lead in a popular line of children's toys. It's a scary thing. Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends toys are now the subject of a major recall by the Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC). The CPSC advises consumers to immediately stop using these toys. Here's the link to their recall notice so you can find out exactly which toys are trouble:
http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml07/07212.html#http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml07/07212.html

*Pass this email along to friends with kids so they can make sure their kids don't have these toys, or put them in their mouths! Sadly, more and more imported toys are being recalled due to toxics. So after you tell your friends about the Thomas recall, then please take action to stop this toxic trend by signing our petition (the link is below).

TELL CONGRESS & THE CPSC TO GET THE LEAD OUT: Sign the petition to let Congress and the CPSC know that, "Testing children's products for toxic chemicals must be a priority. No more toxic toys and children's products!"

*Just click here to sign the petition for children's safety now:

http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/momsrising/signUp.jsp?key=2362&t=petition.dwt

We'll deliver these petition signatures to key members of Congress, and the Executive Director of the CPSC, Patsy Semple, to let them know we demand safety and higher standards for our children. And, we'll also let those leaders know the amount of petition signatures that come in on a daily basis so they know a movement for change is building. When leaders are backed by large numbers of people, then they can more quickly and effectively make important changes. So the more people that sign on the petition, the faster we'll get on top of this issue. Please forward this email and petition link to your friends and family so we can push these changes through quickly.

STOP THIS TOXIC TREND: Sadly recent exposure to lead isn't limited to Thomas the Tank Engine toys. Unhealthy levels of lead are being found in many children's products, from bibs to vinyl lunchboxes to candy. This is particularly dangerous because children under six years old are more likely to put things in their mouths, and because children's developing bodies and brains are more vulnerable to heavy metal exposures than adults.

The Centers for Disease Control notes: Lead poisoning can affect nearly every system in the body. Because lead poisoning often occurs with no obvious symptoms, it frequently goes unrecognized. Lead poisoning can cause learning disabilities, behavioral problems, and, at very high levels, seizures, coma, and even death. Joining together, we can stop these unsafe toys and children's products. Let's stand up as parents and demand oversight from the agency that's supposed to protect us?the Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC).

*Don't forget to sign the petition for children's safety at:
http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/momsrising/signUp.jsp?key=2362&t=petition.dwt

Thanks for taking time to make a difference! - The MomsRising Team

p.s. For more information about the Thomas the Tank Engine product recalls, as well as about the increase in imported children's products with lead, read this ABC News story: http://abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=3275264&page=1

p.p.s. Here's a Center for Disease Control web site which is very informative about lead poisoning: http://www.cdc.gov/nceh/lead/faq/about.htm

p.p.s.s. Find out about other recalled children's products at: http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/category/child.html

Hand Sanitizer = Alcohol Poisoning for Children!

2007-05-31T08:08:00.000-07:00

Please check out the link below and pass the word on!

http://www.snopes.com/medical/toxins/sanitizer.asp

A New Breed O Mom!

2007-05-30T16:48:00.000-07:00

This Memorial Day weekend my sister and her husband decided to reserve a room at a bed and breakfast near a camping area where a number of friends were staying. Though they love to camp themselves, they weren’t quite ready to brave the weekend in a tent with their 4 month old son.

Friday night they arrived late and were slightly concerned about the small size of the room because they were certain others would be disturbed if their baby cried. Fortunately my nephew was in good spirits and all went well. In the morning they were confronted by a nasty owner who treated them as though they were trying to sneak an extra person in. He insisted that his Web site specifically said that special arrangements had to be made for children. My sister was embarrassed and upset and told him that she hadn’t seen such notification but that she was sorry for the misunderstanding. He was extremely rude and continued to make it clear that they were unwelcome.

My sister and her family made the best of their day and that evening her husband approached the owner and told him that they would leave but that he would like to have his money back for the days that they would not be staying. The owner boorishly insisted that he hadn’t told them they had to leave and that he wouldn’t give the money back. My brother-in-law told the owner that he had made it clear that they weren’t welcome and that at the very least he should split the difference. The greedy owner refused. My sister and her husband decided it wasn’t worth the battle and left.

Upon hearing this story I was struck by how customer service seems to be a big issue for families as of late. First, my nightmarish experience with my daughter’s previous daycare provider, next the Balthazar’s debacle, and now this. And the more that moms start telling their stories, the more stories like these seem to come out.

The question is: Why the sudden surge in nasty interactions between business owners and parents. What’s changed?

After much thought I have decided is that there’s a new breed of mommy and the world is having a hard time adapting.

As it turns out “stay-at-home moms” aren’t staying home at all. No, we are getting out and about more than ever, with all our wonderful kiddos in tow. My first two years with my oldest were filled with road trips to the ocean, afternoons at the art museum, sushi dinners, and outdoor concerts. And my situation isn’t that unusual anymore. Most of the great mothers I know spend the better part of their days out and about, sometimes at “kid friendly” places and much more of the time at just plain old cool places to be.

In fact, modern day mommies seem to be redefining what “kid friendly” means. While we enjoy baking, and making crafts with our children we are also unwilling to be shackled to our houses all day long and the kids seem to be better for it. And yes, on occasion I have found myself dealing with a major meltdown under the close scrutiny of the general public’s eye, but in general, I have found that my kids rise to the occasion. They learn quickly what’s appropriate and not appropriate in various situations and reap the reward of having a well rounded life.

And while clearly, some people don’t take kindly with having to share the world with children, overall, I have found that most people are not only tolerant, but downright helpful when needed. On many occasions I have been stopped by people who comment on how nice it is to see children out. Once I even braved a fancy restaurant in downtown New York with my ten week old baby girl. The waitresses cooed to her and I am quite certain that a young couple sitting next to me decided just that night that they were ready to start their own family.

So hooray for the mommies who no longer hide in dark bathrooms to breast feed, or resign themselves to solitary confinement in their homes. And hooray for the moms who insist on getting the best care for their children when they pay money for preschool or childcare.

Most of all hooray for all of the people who support these mommies and make sure that our children feel welcomed and loved wherever they go.

Sites and Events!

2007-05-29T10:11:00.000-07:00

I received this info early yesterday. It sounds like a lot of fun AND it’s FREE!!! Take advantage of it while you can.

Did you know there's a new indoor play area/coffee shop opening today on the westside (directly below 38 Degrees)? Free admission all week beginnning today; grand opening today. It's called Gigglybops - 745 NW Mt. Washington.

For more information you can check out the Web site at http://www.gigglybops.com.

_____________________________________

AND…Here’s another cool Web site you should take time to check out:

Want to swap all those clothes and toys your kids have outgrown for stuff
that fits them?

Check out Kizoodle.com a brand new web destination that will save you money.
How? Because you never have to spend any to shop!

Also, find friends, Mommy Groups, and great family activities in your local
area.

This site has been designed by parents for parents to make raising kids a
little easier and even more fun!

Kizoodle is destined to be your favorite website. Please join today
http://www.kizoodle .com and check out the Kiz Store.

Help us grow! This is a grass roots effort to help moms out nationwide.
Thanks for your support!!
__________________________________
Links to both Web sites will be posted under “Useful Links for Mom”.

If you have an interesting story to share or know of an event or site that other mothers would enjoy, feel free to drop me a line or write up a post and send it my way!

Insure Our Children

2007-05-22T21:36:00.000-07:00

Another important issue brought to my attention by MomsRising. Please act now.

*****************************************

9 million children--one in nine--in the United States don't have any healthcare coverage at all, and millions more are under-insured. We can change this! And, it's important that we do because children are paying a high price for this lack of coverage. In a comparison of all nations, we rank a low 37th in childhood mortality according to the World Health Organization.

TELL CONGRESS TO COVER ALL KIDS: Email a letter to your Congressperson telling them that you are counting on them to guarantee easily accessible, comprehensive healthcare coverage for all children. Tell Congress that they need to start doing this now by reauthorizing State Children's Health Insurance Program (SCHIP) with at least $50 billion to improve benefits, simplify enrollment, and expand coverage to all children.

*TAKE ACTION: E-mail a letter to your Congressperson now, using our easy 1-click tool at:
http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/momsrising/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=11410

PASS ALONG TO FRIENDS & FAMILY: Please help get coverage for all children by forwarding this email to friends and family and asking them to contact their Congressperson as well. With public support behind them, Congress can cover all children.

DON'T LET THE SCHIP GO DOWN: The State Children's Health Insurance Program (SCHIP) is a federal block grant program that provides critical funding to states so that they can give health coverage to millions of children whose families cannot afford it. It's essentially a state health insurance program that covers children who are falling through the healthcare cracks. Congress needs to reauthorize this important healthcare program by September 30th so kids don't lose coverage.

Health coverage saves lives, as Families USA reports, "Uninsured children admitted to the hospital due to injuries were twice as likely to die while in the hospital as their insured counterparts."

JUST THE FACTS FROM THE CHILDREN'S DEFENSE FUND:
• Every 46 seconds, another baby is born uninsured.
• It costs less to provide health insurance coverage to children than to any other group of people.
• The majority of uninsured children live in two-parent households and almost 90 percent live in families where at least one parent works.
• Increases in private health insurance costs are dramatically outpacing increases in wages.
• Ensuring that children have timely, affordable access to health care is a smart economic move. For instance, enrolling uninsured children in health coverage significantly reduces hospitalizations for preventable illnesses.
• Uninsured children are more than five times as likely as insured children to have gone more than two years without a doctor visit.
• What the United States spends on health care per person is more than twice the average spent in industrialized countries, yet we rank near the bottom among those nations in infant mortality rates.
• Existing health care programs for low-income children vary widely, with different standards for eligibility, cost sharing, and benefits in each of the 50 states and the District of Columbia.
• Americans over 65 have access to health coverage under the Medicare program regardless of income, but children have no such guarantee, leaving millions of needy children without timely access to critical health and mental health services.
*Don't forget to email your Congressperson today at: http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/momsrising/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=11410

Best - The MomsRising Team

p.s. A special thank you to Families USA, the Children's Alliance, and the Children's Defense Fund for tracking this issue, as well as for providing information for this e-outreach. And, another thank you to the many aligned organizations working together to get coverage for all children.

Paid Family Leave in Oregon

2007-05-18T19:07:00.000-07:00

I received this in my inbox last night. I would like to encourage you all to find out more about this bill and consider supporting it. For more information you can visit the MomsRising Web site.

We're at a critical juncture in the passage of Paid Family Leave in Oregon. The hurdle right now is getting the policy assigned to a good sub-committee for review in the legislature. If the bill isn't assigned soon, it may linger and die--and never even face a vote before the full House and Senate.

You can help?

CONTACT MADE EASY--SEND A QUICK MESSAGE TODAY: Ask your legislators to ensure the Paid Family Leave bill quickly gets assigned to a Ways & Means sub-committee for review. It's important that legislators know you support this bill during each and every step of the way. Fortunately, we've made this process quick & easy for you.
*To quickly contact your legislators today, just go to: http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/momsrising/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=11416
(Here's how it works: Just click the link above, fill out the form with your name and address so the database can match up to your legislative district, edit the sample letter (or not), then hit "Submit." This will send your email directly to your legislator without you ever needing to look anything up. It's nearly magic!)

The whole process takes about 30 seconds, but the impact goes on for much longer. Believe it or not, taking a moment to email your legislators will make a big difference.

IT'S WORKING - KEEP IT COMING!: Your work supporting Paid Family Leave in Oregon is getting noticed and making a huge impact. Together, you've already sent over 2,000 messages to Oregon legislators in support of the bill. And last Saturday, hundreds came out for "Motherhood Manifesto Day" at the Hollywood Theatre in Portland. MomsRising supporters made beautiful ONEsies and wrote letters in support of Paid Family Leave. Take a look at the picture of one beautiful ONEsie example in this message!

WHY THIS ISSUE? Paid family leave helps combat poverty, helps give children a healthy start, and helps lower the wage gap between women and men by providing the structural support necessary to balance work and family. The United States is one of only 4 countries in the world that doesn't offer some form of paid leave to new mothers--we join Papua New Guinea, Swaziland, and Lesotho with that dubious distinction. It's time to catch up with the rest of the world. Paid family leave has been shown to reduce infant mortality by as much as 20% (and the U.S. ranks a low 37th of all countries in infant mortality), as well as to help keep families out of poverty. Right now, having a baby is a leading cause of "poverty spells" in this country (poverty spells are a time when income dips below what's needed for basic living expenses like food and rent). And a full quarter of families with children under six years old live in poverty here. Offering paid family leave is a critical component of a truly family-friendly nation.
SEND TODAY! IT'S EASY! Don't forget to email your legislators today at: http://www.democracyinaction.org/dia/organizationsORG/momsrising/campaign.jsp?campaign_KEY=11416

Washington MomsRising members just pushed this policy into law, and Oregon can do it too! Help make sure Oregon becomes a "Paid Family Leave state"!

Best - The MomsRising Team

p.s. Want more info on the bill? The Paid Family Leave bill (HB2575) would provide up to six weeks of partial pay for employees (up to $250 per week) at companies with at least 25 workers in the case of birth, adoption/foster care, or a serious illness of the worker or a member of their family. Although current Oregon law requires that employers must protect workers' jobs for up to 12 weeks in these same cases, this leave is often unpaid. The program would be funded by a small employee paycheck deduction (about 1 cent for each hour worked) not from employers, which ensures families are supported when they need it most without harming businesses. A similar program is now in effect in California, and was just signed into law in Washington State.

Where is Peter Pan when you need him?

2007-05-17T09:48:00.000-07:00

What started out as cute has recently become a HUGE concern. Several months ago my 5 year old started talking about how she doesn’t want to grow up. In retrospect I think my response was a mistake. "I don’t want you to grow up either.” I replied. Then I would joke, that if she kept growing, I wouldn’t be able to pick her up anymore at all, “And what will we do then?” I asked with a laugh.

I was often delighted with her creative and sincere responses to my questions about the future, “Well, then I’ll pick you up Mama.” she would say. She always came up with something adorable that melted my heart. Maybe, in this way I encouraged her fear.

In the last couple of weeks these conversations have taken a turn for the worse. Now when she talks about growing up her voice is filled with fear. She tells me that she doesn’t want to change and look different, or have a different voice. Sometimes she even brings up death. During one conversation she began sobbing and said that she didn’t want to live somewhere else, and that she wanted to always live with Mama and Daddy. I of course reassured her that she could live with us as long as she wants (yikes!), but she was still slow to be calmed.

There was yet another unnerving conversation this morning as I fixed my daughter’s hair. We were talking about my up coming birthday when all of the sudden she gushed, “I don’t want you to turn 33 Mama. It’s not my favorite age for you!” I was stunned. She went on to explain, “I don’t want you to look different. You look different when you get older. I like the way you look when you are 32.” After that she said that she didn’t want to have another birthday ever because she wasn’t going to grow up. As you can imagine our morning ended up in tears when I was unable to assure her that she would stay five forever.

Currently, my approach to soothing my daughter’s fears has included telling her about all of the wonderful things that happen as we get older, reassuring her that she has many sleeps before she grows up, and trying desperately to change the focus of the conversation to buy myself some time to think.

I would love to hear from any of you who may have had similar conversations with your children. What do you tell them? What seems to ease their anxieties about growing up? How do you approach the subject of dying when it arises?

A late night trip to the ER.

2007-05-15T14:03:00.000-07:00

Around 10 o’clock last night I received a phone call from my sister who lives in Seattle. She told me she had just gotten back from taking her four month old son to the emergency room. I would have been alarmed if it weren’t for the obvious note of embarrassment in her voice. Apparently she had been enjoying a night out with her girlfriend while her husband watched the baby. An hour or so into her evening she received an upsetting call from her husband who was clearly concerned. Their son had had been inconsolably crying for 45 minutes straight and her husband was slowly becoming sure that something was wrong. As my sister told me her story she insisted that the crying was out of character for her baby. They had gone through a colicky period with him that ended four weeks ago, and according to her, even back then he didn’t cry like he was crying at that moment.

Not that I’m sure this makes a difference, but I feel I should mention that this is her first child, and the combo of the fear in her husbands voice and the pained screams coming from her son were just too much to bear. Only eight blocks away from home and sort of sure something was wrong, she began running in the direction of her house and screaming at her husband to call 911. He could only reply “And what, tell them that our baby is crying?”

Well, my sis made it home in record time to find her baby blue faced screaming and arching like he’d been lit on fire. Her presence did nothing to calm him only increasing their panic, so they ran to the nearest hospital, Group Health, where they were told to wait at the end of the line, screaming baby and all. Apparently their staff can tell that a screaming baby is perfectly fine without looking at or touching them at all. Well, as you can imagine my sister and her husband weren’t having that, so they went to the next hospital, Swedish, which happens to be a favorite of mine. And as they walked through the doors to be greeted by the incredibly responsive and professional staff, their son instantly stopped crying.

Yup, that was it. He was perfectly fine; happy even. My sister was mortified. And from all these miles away I can picture her perfectly, telling each staff member, “He was really crying… I mean really it wasn’t normal.”

After she told me her story, my sister made sure to point out that one of the books I had given her said to take a baby to the doctor if they cried inconsolably for over an hour. Then she asked me when I thought a mother in the same situation should take their child to the ER.

This is an excellent question, and the truth is, I’m not the best person to ask. When my first daughter was only 10weeks old she broke out in hives from being held by someone wearing perfume. It didn’t bother her a bit, but I freaked out and called 911. That’s right! A fire truck AND ambulance showed up to deal with a case of hives that had disappeared by the time they pulled up in front of our house.

The reality is, my husband and I have found ourselves in similar situations over and over, especially when our girls were babies and could tell us what was wrong. My philosophy is to always err on the safe side. So I told my sister (with a stifled laugh) that I thought she had made the right decision.

I would love to hear what you think. Do you have guidelines you use when deciding weather to head to the doc’s office or not? How long would you let your baby cry before heading to the ER?

My Mom's Day

2007-05-13T15:25:00.000-07:00

Today has not been the Mother’s Day I had hoped for. The girls woke up early, my husband went in to work, and my youngest is having on of THOSE days.

I spent the best part of my morning sending little Rain in and out of time-out as she threw fits, screaming at the top of her lungs, over everything and nothing at all. And When Rain wasn’t torturing me with her unnaturally loud shriek, Phoenix was tattling on her for anything she could possibly come up with. “Mama, Rain is touching me. Mama, Rain has the remote. Mama, Rain is making too much noise!”

Shortly after 10 AM I had a little break down and threw myself onto my bed in an angry fit and wished that I could stay there for the rest of the day. The truth is, I wasn’t dealing with anything that that I hadn’t dealt with before, I was just sulking because I wasn’t having that fantasy Mother’s Day. You know, the one where good little children bring their mothers breakfast in bed and behave like perfect angels all day long.

After my fit passed I grabbed a couple of snacks and a picnic basket and took the girls out in the sun. For the next two hours we played on the swing, sifted through the sand in the sand box, and blew bubbles up into the cloudless sky. As I watched the girls play with each other and laugh I found myself amazed at how big they had gotten and wondering where the time had gone. It seems like only yesterday my stomach was flat and my boobs were perky. Back then I spent my nights out on the town and my mornings sleeping in late.

Strangely, as I reminisced about my pre-mommy days, I didn’t find myself yearning to go back. I’d like to tell you it’s because mothering is more exciting or more fun than anything I did while I was a swinging single, but that’s not the case. In fact I am working harder now than I ever did in the past. My days are long and sometimes painfully difficult but man… the love I feel now…well nothing I experienced back then compares and I am a better person for it. That’s right! The very same children who drive me to the brink of insanity day after day have also taught me love, compassion, and devotion at a level I never knew existed and I wouldn’t trade that for anything.

So today is not going to be that fantasy Mother’s Day that most moms dream of and that’s ok because luckily for me there are plenty more to come.

Happy Mother's Day

2007-05-12T21:58:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother’s Day to all you wonderful mommies out there. This is a beautiful image that was created by my beloved Aunt Pat who also created the logo for this blog. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

MOMS RISING!

2007-05-10T15:02:00.000-07:00

MomsRising is a grassroots movement with the goal of growing large enough to effect the 2008 elections. “MomsRising gives mothers, and all who have mothers, a voice in shaping the laws & policies that affect our lives. You can sign online petitions on timely issues like healthcare, flexible work options, paid family leave, childcare, living wages, and more…” Find out more about MomsRising by visiting their Web site at http://www.momsrising.org/. They also have some great MomsRising paraphernalia that would make perfect Mother’s day gifts for moms just like me!

Help feed our furry friends.

2007-05-09T20:06:00.000-07:00

I just received this message and wanted to pass it on right away. Our two dogs, Olive and Zero, are a beloved part of our family. It breaks my heart to think of all of the animals out there that are neglected and unloved. Here’s a little something we can do to ease there pain.

……..

Hi, all you animal lovers. This is pretty simple. Please tell ten friends to tell ten today! The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily to meet their quota of getting free food donated every day to abused and neglected animals.

It takes less than a minute to go to their site and click on the purple box "fund food for animals" for free. This doesn't cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising.

Here's the web site! Pass it along to people you know.

www.theanimalrescuesite.com

AGAIN, PLEASE TELL 10 FRIENDS!!!

Cancer-causing petrochemical in children’s bath products!?!

2007-05-09T12:15:00.000-07:00

As mothers we obsess over what our children wear, watch on TV, and eat; but we all too often forget to consider what we are putting on their skin. According to an article that was released yesterday, Thursday, February 8, 2007, by the Breast Cancer Fund “A hidden cancer-causing petrochemical has been found in dozens of children’s bath products and adults’ personal care products, in some cases at levels that are more than twice the U.S. Food and Drug Administration’s lenient recommended maximum.” It also states that “Contrary to what many consumers may believe, the FDA does not review or regulate cosmetics products or ingredients for safety before they are sold to the public and has no legal authority to require safety assessments of cosmetics.”

Now I’m no expert on this subject, but I know that I am always concerned about the chemicals on the food my family eats so it stands to reason that I should at least take the time to learn more about the chemicals I am putting on my children’s bodies as well as my own. And though it easy to convince ourselves that we would somehow know if dangerous chemicals were in the soaps and shampoos that we regularly use, the reality is that long-term effects are just that… they take a long time to show up. Think back to the 17th century, when women caked their faces with white cream make up made out of lead and mercury. Yikes!

The link below will take you to the article mentioned above. You will also find links to resources that allow you to find out what is actually in the everyday products that you use. It’s worth checking out!
www.breastcancerfun d.org/site/ pp.asp?c= kwKXLdPaE& b=2483603

The Sitter Center

2007-05-08T18:22:00.000-07:00

Are you a stay at home mom looking to make some extra money? Are you a nanny looking for the perfect family? Do you have a teenage son or daughter who wants to start their first job? If you answered yes to any of the questions above then check out www.TheSitterCenter.com. The Sitter Center is currently enrolling babysitters, house sitters, pet sitters, and nannies living and working in Central Oregon. What a great way to find families or individuals looking for the valuable services you have to offer!

¡Cinco de Mayo Fiesta!

2007-05-02T19:09:00.000-07:00

This sounds like a fun event for both children and grown ups. And it's free!!!

May 5 - FREE

Come Celebrate Cinco de Mayo!

When: Saturday, May 5, noon - 2 pm
Where: Grandview Hall Cafeteria at COCC
What: Taco and Burrito Bar, Classical Guitar, Mariachi Band and Children's Activities

The public is invited to attend a Cinco de Mayo celebration from noon to 2 p.m. on Saturday, May 5, in Grandview Hall Cafeteria at COCC. Featured at the event will be a taco and burrito bar, classical guitar and mariachi band music and children's activities. The event is free and open to the public.

Cinco de Mayo ("The Fifth of May" in Spanish) is a national holiday in Mexico and is widely celebrated in the United States. It commemorates the victory of Mexican forces led by General Ignacio Zaragoza over the French occupational forces in the Battle of Puebla on May 5, 1862. It is a common misconception that Cinco de Mayo is Mexico's Independence Day, which is actually celebrated on September 16. This event is free and open to the public. Parking is available in all general college lots.The event is sponsored by the COCC Student Life department, the COCC Multicultural Center and Oregon Leadership Institute. For information, call 383-7590.

For the full announcement go to http://www.cocc.edu/What's+New/20399.aspx

TV?

2007-05-01T21:00:00.000-07:00

My five year old would sit in front of the television all day long if I let her. She is a cartoon junky. And much like her mother, she loves the movies. On the other hand, my two year old could care less about the TV and would spend her whole day outside if she had it her way.

I have to admit, I find myself blushing with shame when I admit to turning on the tube for my kids. Many of my close friends are adamantly against letting their children watch the television…ever. I mean they truly get fired up about the topic, especially when it comes to the commercialization of all of the cartoon characters. I, on the other hand, am pretty non-committal on the subject.

I definitely see an increase in my daughter’s negative behaviors when I let her watch cartoons for much more than an hour, but at the same time I really enjoy cuddling on the couch with her and watching an episode of Dora the Explorer or getting some pizza and having dinner over Shrek I. It’s great bonding time for us. And while I certainly don’t agree with using the television as a babysitter or letting your child get sucked into the boob tube all day; I’m definitely not ready (or willing) to nix the TV from my house forever.

So tell me, how do you feel about children and television? Are there shows you feel good about letting your kids watch? Why? How do you feel about the argument that the television can be used as an educational tool?

How do you feel about TV in preschools or daycares?

There’s a party in the potty!

2007-04-28T14:07:00.000-07:00

About 3 weeks ago we decided to start potty training our youngest. Our goal was to have her well on her way to being fully trained by her second birthday (April 26). Some of our friends and family thought it was too early but I was convinced that she was ready as she would tell me immediately after going in her pants and then demand that I promptly change her diaper. I figured if dirtying herself was that upsetting to her then I should take advantage of the situation and rid myself of one of my least favorite chores. After much thought and discussion my husband and I decided to take a four day weekend and dedicate ourselves to the potty training process.

Thursday morning we implemented the “No Diapers at Home” policy. At first our daughter seemed excited by the whole idea as she picked through the bright pile of panties I had stacked next to her special potty seat. For the first hour or two she ran around proudly displaying the bright purple pair that she had picked for herself, however, two accidents later she stood clutching her diaper to her chest and crying for me to put it back on. Though the huge tears rolling down her cheeks tugged at my heart, I stuck to my guns.

For the next two days I split my time between trips to the bathroom and washing loads of urine soaked clothes; and by the end of the weekend I had learned a level of patience I didn’t know existed and Rain had learned to save her potty for the toilet. Since then there have been surprisingly few accidents and even though we diaper her at nap time and bed time, she has been waking in the middle of the night and yelling for us to take her to the potty or waking up completely dry.

I have to admit that I am floored at how well potty training has gone for us and I have had several parents approach me and ask me what my secret is. What I have found while talking to many of these parents is that potty training is not a “one way fits all” type of deal. It is clear that what worked for Rain would not work for many other children, as not all are troubled by wetting themselves. In fact, I had a parent tell me today that his daughter would actually rather wet herself than sit on her potty seat. So what should he do? I would love to hear from other parents who have tackled or are in the midst of tackling this great hurdle in our children’s development. What has worked for you? What hasn’t?

Join the Wild Rumpus!

2007-04-27T15:16:00.000-07:00

As many of you know, not so long ago I was faced with the challenge of finding daycare for my 2 year old. This search made looking for a quality preschool seem like a walk in the park. To make matters worse my poor little girl would cry every time we left her with our regular babysitter just to go out for the evening; I couldn’t possibly imagine how she would do being left at a child care for most of the day. I knew I had to find just the right place to make her situation work.

To make a long story short: after phoning and touring several daycares, I received a tip from another mom. She told me about an “amazing” child care called The Rumpus Room. I have to admit, I was fairly skeptical by the time I actually called to find out if they had any openings and set up a tour. I was braced for the inevitable “no” that followed most of my inquiries and was fully expecting to be disappointed during the tour, if I made it that far. Pessimism had gotten the best of me.

To my surprise the director was responsive and friendly throughout our whole initial conversation. She weathered my barrage of questions like a pro and called me back directly with answers to all of the questions she had needed more information on. She didn’t even seem phased when I asked if I could pop in first thing the following morning. We were off to a good start.

The tour went even better. The Rumpus Room has a wonderful family feel to it and its location, right off of Wall downtown, is incredibly convenient. My little girl wanted nothing to do with me once we stepped through the door. She sat at a tiny table in a tiny chair and played happily with the other children while I once again drilled the director for any further information I could squeeze out of her. Here is what I have learned about The Rumpus Room from my phone calls, tour, and personal experience since enrolling Rain:

Its environment is cozy and comforting.
The staff is attentive and nurturing.
It’s filled with age appropriate toys and activities that are being actively used on a daily basis.
There is a well kept outdoor area that is used every day except for in extreme weather conditions.
They have a large motor area called “the bouncy room” that is filled with mats and large foam blocks, bridges, and wedges where the children can get rowdy on rainy or icy days (or whenever they have extra energy).
They serve high quality organic meals!!!!!
They were recently certified as an Eco-Healthy Child Care.
Their class sizes and ratios are small.
There is an amazing amount of parent/owner/teacher communication through regular e-mail, daily take home reports, parent support meetings, and one on one attention at pick up and drop off time.

Rain loves her new daycare. She has only cried once or twice at drop off and that was when she had a bug that I was unaware of. Prior to starting daycare my little one showed little interest in talking but now, only a month and a half later, she is speaking in two or three word sentences, singing songs, and fully potty trained (thanks to staff cooperation)!

I am also pleased to report that the owner is very concerned with parent satisfaction and just finished conducting an annual evaluation that consisted of a thorough questionnaire, with room for comments, which each parent was able to fill out. Amazing!

In case you were wondering, The Rumpus Room is certified for children ages 6 weeks to 4years and they currently have 3 full time openings for infants (6 weeks to 8 moths). I highly recommend this child care. To find out more about The Rumpus Room and its openings you can call 541-383-4599 or send an e-mail to Rumpusroom@bendcable.com .

National Week of the Young Child

2007-04-25T11:12:00.000-07:00

For those of you who didn’t know, April 22-28 is National Week of the Young Child.

National Week of the Young Child is sponsored by the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC) with the intention of bringing public attention and recognition to the needs of young children and their families as well as the programs and organizations that serve them. This is a nation wide event that communities celebrate by hosting a slew of festivals and events that are family focused and educational.

Our own community has numerous activities/events taking place on a daily basis. One notable event that is hosted by Working Wonders is a community dinner that is being held in Hollinshead Barn from 4-8 PM this Friday (see invitation below). There will be live music preformed by Victor Johnson, a community project, and child centered organizations and businesses will be on hand to provide useful information to local families.

This is a wonderful opportunity for families to get together and find out more about each other as well as the community we live in. For more information on this event as well as many others that are still taking place visit Working Wonders as www.workingwonders.org

Working Wonders Children’s Museum
Hosts a Community Dinner
Friday, April 27th
4-8pm
at Hollinshead Barn
1237 NE Jones Rd.

Join us to celebrate “Week of the Young Child”
with dinner, a community art project and a
special performance by award winning
children’s musician Victor Johnson.

Several community organizations will be on hand to offer
activities and information for families and young children including
Bend Parks and Recreation, Focus Pocus, Bend & Jerry’s,
Art Station, KIDS Center, Healthy Beginnings, Kiwanis Club and more.

Admission and Dinner are Free!

541-389-4500
www.workingwonders.org

Community Dinner sponsored by Barret Business Services, Inc.

The Family News

2007-04-23T17:18:00.000-07:00

More great news! The Central Oregon Family News has expanded to the Web. What a great way to find out about local, family friendly events and recreation! If you are looking for a guide to summer camps in our area or trying to find out more about the local schools then check them out at http://www.cofamilynews.com .

Bellatazza! (not Balthazar's)

2007-04-23T14:23:00.000-07:00

It’s time to switch gears! All of this nasty business about Balthazar’s was starting to get me down when all of the sudden I received some uplifting info in my inbox. Below is an e-mail I received earlier today regarding a program that Bellatazza has set up to help support our local PTA’s. Hey, I quit caffeine a long time ago and I still need my morning cup of joe, so why not make sure that some of the money I spend on my non-addictive addiction gets put to good use!

Hello Annette,

While reading the e-mails running around about Balthazar’s, I came across your blogspot (http://mom2mombend.blogspot.com/2007/04/balthazars-very-important-review-and.html). Understanding your mission, I thought you might like to know of a program, through BELLATAZZA, that is geared towards supporting PTA’s.

Both my parents were and still are involved in education. My mother was a German teacher with a master’s degree in ESL (English as a Second Language) and my father was an English teacher, eventually moving on to college administration at a community college.

I now have three amazing boys that are 6, 4, and 2 years old! If anyone can understand the woes of educational funding and its importance, it is I!

With that in mind, Bellatazza chose to be the change we wished to see. This year we set up a program at High Lakes Elementary as a test. Here is how the program works:

Faculty and parents go to www.bellatazza.com and follow the link to Kid Café.
Set up a username/password and account information
Select the school PTA you wish to support ( you must have a child enrolled or be staff of the school)
Choose your favorite coffee.
Check out on the secure server.
BELLATAZZA will deliver to the school, your order on a set deliver day.

Quarterly, BELLATAZZA gives 3.00 per pound ordered to the schools PTA (nearly 30%).

This program has worked well for the High Lakes PTA. With a school that consists of 500 families, statistics say those families will use more than 300lbs weekly of coffee at home. That’s 1200.00 weekly waiting to be directed to the PTA.

If you would like to pass this on to a PTA president or active PTA member, I’d be glad to help them set up this program!

Thank you,
Stewart Fritchman
BELLATAZZA

Balthazar's - A Very Important Review and Then Some

2007-04-20T20:41:00.000-07:00

A member of the MOMS club sent the following message out earlier today. It is extremely disturbing and very important that we all take a moment to read it and choose carefully the next time we give our money to local restaurant owners. Below this post is yet another disturbing story regarding Balthazars restaurant which is located at 1456 SW Knoll Ave., 541-382-6622. Please feel free to offer any further input on this establishment.

Story #1

Hello fellow friends and parents,

I am writing to tell you about something that recently happened to me which was very disturbing and unpleasant. I recently dined out at Baltazar's Restaurant with my friends the Liebmans and the Lindekoffs. We had a sitter for Sachi and Jade, and brought Kobe because he was only a few months old and slept most of the time. Three different staff people there were very unpleasant to us because we brought the baby and treated us very rudely despite the fact that he slep the entire time and never made a peep. Baltazar himself made it a point to come over to our table to tell Tom and I (and I quote-) that "they do not specialize in children" so we had to put him on the floor since there was no highchair to set his car seat into.

A few weeks ago, I was encouraged to write the restaurant a letter because of how rude they had been to us so I finally got around to it this week. After asking for approval from the MOMS Club of Bend board members to use letterhead, I wrote to Baltazar describing our experience and asked him to consider purchasing one highchair to accommodate parents with a small child who may dine at the restaurant.

Baltazar called me today and made it very clear that he does not want any children in his restaurant. In fact, his exact words were, "We are not going to buy even one highchair because we don't want them (kids) here." When I suggested to him that Bend was a family friendly community and that by treating patrons disrespectfully for accidentally bringing a child into the restaurant is actually not good for his business and he was shutting out a corner of the market, he asked me if I was threatening him, told me he would sue me and then concluded the conversation with a "GO TO H*LL YOU F*!KING B**CH."

I was completely stunned and shocked by having been treated this way- but after being harassed in the restaurant for having a sleeping 8 week old with us, I guess I should not be surprised.

There are many other establishments in this community that would never treat their patrons in this manner- and I hope you will consider joining me in finding alternative dining options where people are treated with dignity and respect, whether or not their children are with them.

As I told Baltazar, I completely support restaurants approaching customers who have unruly children, or whose children are disrupting the dining experiences of the other patrons and politely asking them to get the situation under control or leave- but blatant rudeness such as his demonstrates poor business etiquette. If Baltazar's policy is anti-children in their restaurant, they should post a sign at the door stating, "No infants or children allowed." It would save an unknowing parent such as me the harassment of being indirectly told multiple times while dining there that my child was unwelcome. Please share this message with others you know.

As for Tom and I, we will never again dine there again and hope you'll join us in demonstrating that behavior such as that will not be rewarded with our continued patronage.

Thanks,

Yvette and Tom

Story #2

I have to tell my story - January 4th was our 3rd anniversary and a week day. We wanted to go to La Rosa because it is right across the street from our neighborhood, but they were slammed, so we thought we'd go to Baltazar's. We took Stella. We were all three dressed up (my husband wearing a suit because he'd been at work) and we were treated like we had the PLAGUE when we walked in. Ol' Balty flung his arm out as he exclaimed his query "does it look like we serve children here?" in response to our request for a high chair. I thought he was a gigantic ASS, especially since his taco stand is little more than a block building in a strip mall in BEND OREGON for heaven's sake! We've eaten in a lot of four star restaurants while traveling with Stella and never been so rudely treated. I've told a LOT of people about that story and I don't care how good his food might be, he doesn't have a right to treat people that way. If he doesn't want kids - he should PUT A SIGN ON THE DOOR. As for me, I'll NEVER spend a dime in his place.

Getting Started With NEW (A Review)

2007-04-20T14:20:00.000-07:00

To say I was skeptical when my friend first suggested that I attend the Network of Entrepreneurial Women’s (NEW) monthly meeting would be an understatement. It wasn’t that I didn’t think it would be a positive experience; it was more that I doubted my ability to be outgoing and meet new people.

Since the start-up of my freelance writing business, almost six months ago, I have spent the majority of my time behind a computer hunched over a keyboard. Most of the clients I get exist somewhere out there in the virtual world, and e-mail and the occasional phone call serve as my main means of communication.

As a mother of two small children, freelancing from home seemed like the perfect way to bring in some cash while staying available for my family; and while this arrangement has been wonderful in many ways it has also led to the rapid decline in my social and face-to-face networking skills.

For the last six months I have focused most of my marketing and networking energies online. Fortunately for me, the Internet has a huge number of networking forums that allow business owners to excel by adding friends and then sharing leads and referrals. Though I have certainly benefited from this system, the truth is that I want to work locally. Clients that won’t or can’t disappear into cyberspace when it comes time to pay would be a huge plus, and beyond that, establishing a positive business reputation in our community has become something of a goal of mine (and very difficult to do from my home office).

On April 18th I boldly met my girlfriend and drove out to the Bend Golf and Country Club to attend my first NEW meeting as a guest. I moved in closer to Michelle as we entered a room filled with women who were greeting each other with smiles on their faces. My hands instantly got clammy and I wondered if I had made a mistake. As I stood there nervously chewing on my lower lip, a lady dressed in a black skirt and purple jacket walked right up to us without a moment’s hesitation. I marveled at the ease with which she approached us and thought “I am so out of place here.” My throat tightened as she greeted the people around me and finally, turning to face me she smiled and said “And what is your name?” a simple enough question.

“Uh, Annette.” I clumsily replied.
“Hi Annette” she said and stepped in a little closer, “and what do you do?”
“I write...” I could feel myself blush, “and edit. I am a writer. I do copy… copywriting, you know, for Web sites, newsletters, brochures…” well, you get the point. I stumbled horribly, but she didn’t really seem to notice. Actually, she seemed excited. She told me there was another writer in the room who I should meet. She even went and found her and brought her over to where I was. Before I knew it I was thigh high in unsolicited conversations. Everyone who approached me seemed genuinely interested in my business and many became strong potentials for future work. Without much effort I was on a roll.

As the night went on I became more and more comfortable. Michelle treated me to a drink from the temporary bar they had set up in the corner of the room and after a couple of sips I found my self approaching others in exactly the same manner I had been approached earlier. It was like the best girls night ever with a bit of business twist to it.

At some point the room was called to order and we all took our seats at large round tables that had been set around the room. For the next hour or so we ate dinner while we met the women at our table and exchanged business cards. We all took turns telling each other about our businesses and discussing ways in which we could market our services. It was great to hear about how other women were running their businesses and succeeding in their efforts. It was a relief to know that there were so many women that I could potentially learn from or turn to for support.

After dinner the president of NEW stood up and asked the room how many people had received referrals from within the group and over half of the room stood up! It was reassuring to know that the group wasn’t all talk. That, in fact, some leads actually turned into clients. I have to admit, I was totally jazzed and feeling optimistic about the possibility of building a career that could thrive here in Bend.

The rest of the evening was filled with round table discussions, a raffle drawing (with some really cool prizes), and two guest speakers from KTVZ news channel 21. I even met a MOMS club member who just happened to be sitting at my table.

All in all I left the meeting ready to sign up and hopeful about the possibilities of growing my business locally through a supportive and committed group of women. As I drove home it occurred to me that NEW is wonderful resource for many of the moms here in town who either want to start a business or already have one that they are running from home.

For $150 a year and $25 a month (for dinner) I say the benefits of joining NEW clearly outweigh the cost. There are tons of advertising opportunities within the network and as far as I can tell, I haven’t yet seen newspaper ad, listing, or flyer that has quite the same impact as a handshake and shared meal.

To find out more about NEW visit http://www.networkwomen.org/index.htm.

Activities and Links

2007-04-17T12:58:00.000-07:00

It’s time to eat granola and get in touch with your inner hippy. Here is a link to information on the Procession of the Species Parade, which is put on by the Central Oregon Environmental Center, and takes place on Saturday, April 21st in downtown Bend. This event sounds like tons of fun for kids and parents alike; and what a great way to support our local habitat while teaching our kids to appreciate the natural world they live in.

http://www.envirocenter.org/COEC/coec/Events__Activities/Procession_of_the_Species_Parade/

I will add the Central Oregon Environmental Center’s link to “useful links 4 moms” as it keeps an updated list of cool events taking place around town that will help us keep our community (and world) green.

Also, a reader sent me a link to this neat site called Lila guide http://www.lilaguide.com/ . Lila guide is a place moms can go to read and post reviews about their local businesses, activities, and products. There are only a couple of reviews posted about businesses in the Bend area; however, there are tons of informative reviews that may be helpful to you when making a decision about an important purchase. Best of all, it’s another site that enables moms to help each other out!

The Mom2Mom Bend blog is off to a great start and I want to thank everyone for your support and added input. Keep the links and comments coming and keep your fingers crossed in hopes that warmer weather is on its way.

Let's Talk Ratios

2007-04-16T11:50:00.000-07:00

“You might want to come and check out the program first. We have a really busy group here.” I had just told the potential child care provider, on the other end of the line, that my 2 year old daughter (Rain) had never been in daycare before.

“Of course,” I replied, hesitated and then asked, “How many children are in your program?”

“Oh, I have about 16 kids of all different ages. I have some that are teeny tiny and then a whole group that are just about to start school.” The woman on the other end of the line laughed. “And that doesn’t include the teenagers that come over on the bus after school. Most of them have been with me forever.”

I eyed little Rain who was sitting only a couple of feet away quietly painting in her highchair. I used my pen to scratch a question mark underneath the in-home caregiver’s name. “Wow!” I said and then thought for a minute, “So do you have an aid or a helper that works for you?”

“Oh no!” the woman exclaimed. “I couldn’t stand it if my kids liked anyone else better than me; I just love these little guys! Like I said, most of them are with me for a long time.” My jaw dropped and I raised my pen and slowly scratched the letters C-R-A-Z-Y in front of the question mark as the woman excitedly chattered on. “But since your daughter would be new to daycare you should definitely check to see if my program would be a good fit first. We are just so busy here.” She laughed again, “Like right now all of the kids are just runnin around out in the back yard gettin dirty like kids should…”

I wondered where she might be if all of the kids were “just runnin out in the backyard.” I could hear children playing far off in the background as the woman continued to talk, clearly relieved to have some adult interaction. As I drew a big X through the providers name I envisioned Rain being pummeled by a pack of unsupervised children while Ms. Cheerful popped happy pills off in the distance. I wouldn’t be observing her program.

Let’s talk Ratios!!!

I probably don’t need to point out all of the red flags that came up during this brief phone call, but what I do want to focus some time on is the subject of ratios. The state has established specific rules and regulations when it comes to how child care centers, certified family child care homes, and registered family child care homes are run. I personally ordered copies of all of the rules and regulations when my friend and I were considering opening up our own center. If you would like to do the same you can order your booklets by calling the Child Care Division at 503-947-1400, or you can call toll free by dialing 1800-556-6616. You can also review the rules by visiting http://www.oregon.gov/EMPLOY/CCD/CCD_forms.shtml and surfing through the links.

The rules and regulations for both centers and family child care homes spell out the exact child to teacher ratio that is allowable for various age ranges. These ratios tend to vary slightly according to which type of facility you are looking at and how they choose to group the children. However, for the most part there are some basic guidelines you can use to help you choose the best place for your child.

First, it is important to establish the difference between child care centers, certified family child care homes, and registered family child care homes. The following definitions should clear this up.

Child Care Center - a child care facility that is certified to care for thirteen or more children, or a facility that is certified to care for twelve or fewer children and located in a building constructed as other than a single family dwelling.

Certified Family Child Care Home – A child care facility located in a building constructed as a single family dwelling that has certification to care for a maximum of 16 children.

Registered Family Child Care Home – The residence of the provider, who has a current Family Child Care Registration at that address and who provides care in the family living quarters.

The bottom line is that certification = tighter guidelines and rules and regulations which, in my opinion, is a good thing. As for ratios, in general, the state has set forth the following rules:

Age / Teacher to Child Ratio / Maximum # of Children

Infant / 1:4 / 8

Toddler / 1:5 / 10

Preschooler / 1:10 / 20

These ratios are specific to Child Care Centers; however the owner may choose to group the children slightly differently to change the ratios for example:

Age / Teacher to Child Ratio / Maximum # of Children

6 weeks to 30 months / 1:4 / 8

30 months to Kindergarten / 1:10 / 20

The state mandated ratios are somewhat different for both certified and registered family child care homes but I tend measure all facilities by these guidelines. Please see the link above to find out more specific information on the states rules and regulations for each type of child care facility.

It is also important to note that a really good child care will try to stay below these ratios. As everybody knows, the lower the ratio the better the care your child receives. I consider it a red flag when I notice that a provider is regularly pushing the ratio limits.

A final note:
Centers are certified for a specific number of children; you should always feel comfortable asking the owner what that number is. Certified family child care providers are limited to having a maximum of 16 children at any 1 time. Registered family child care home providers are limited to a maximum of 10 children at any 1 time.

Quality Indicators and Red Flags Galore

2007-04-13T16:07:00.000-07:00

So we have already established that finding high quality child care isn’t easy in Bend. Many of the well established, highly regarded programs are full, which leaves many mothers in a tough position. In fact, those of us that have to find care for our children have probably, at one point or another, found ourselves asking “How will I know if a child care program is good or bad?”

Unfortunately there is no clear answer to this question, however, there are several quality indicators you can look for when touring various child care establishments. And perhaps more importantly, there are childcare warning signs to look out for once your child is enrolled in a program.

The following are factors that you should consider when choosing or re-evaluating your child’s caregiver:

Environment: Is the physical environment warm and inviting? Are there plenty of toys and activities that are available and regularly implemented in the classroom curriculum? Is it dark or are there plenty of windows that allow the light to come in?

Teachers’ disposition: Are the teacher’s that care for your child kind, nurturing, and patient or do they seem easily irritated and indifferent?

Ratio: What is the child to teacher ratio? A smaller class size is always preferable as it allows your child to receive more one on one attention and adequate guidance throughout his/her daily activities.

Staff turnover: Do you know the names of all of the teachers who care for your child or is there a new face in the classroom every week or every month? High staff turnover often indicates problems behind the scenes.

Teachers’ qualifications: Do the majority of the teachers have some type of job related education or training? Every one who works in child care is required to attend a certain number of training hours each year. Your child care provider should be able to provide some sort of proof that the teachers have been adequately trained.

Curriculum: What is the classroom curriculum? Are there activities planned out for your children? Is there a schedule for the daily activities? Most children thrive in an environment that has strong predictable boundaries. Kids love knowing what’s coming next and once they become familiar with their daily routine they will enjoy telling you all about it. Most high quality facilities post their curriculum as well as their daily routine for the parents review.

Ok, so what if you’ve already placed your son or daughter in a child care and recently you have started to have this sinking feeling that something’s wrong. At drop-off and pick-up time nothing seems obviously wrong but still, something you can’t quite put your finger on is trying to tell you that things aren’t right.

Here are some red flags to look for. They are strong indicators that your child is not receiving high quality care.

The owner or director discourages parents dropping in. Teachers act surprised, flustered, or suddenly change what they’re doing or how they are acting when you stop by unexpectedly.
After a month or so your child still hasn’t adjusted to their day care and becomes upset each time you leave.
Your child suddenly stops wanting to attend their child care when previously they were happy.
Your child tells you that they are afraid of or don’t like a specific teacher; they become quiet or withdrawn when that particular teacher is present.
Frequent staff turnover.
The director is regularly offsite and you can’t easily access their contact info.
You find the children unattended or out of the teacher’s earshot or direct line of sight.
The teachers seem irritable or disinterested when talking to or interacting with you or the children.
Your child has a large number of injuries that go unexplained.
The director becomes defensive when you approach them with your concerns!

For more helpful information on finding high quality care for your children visit the Oregon Child Care Resource and Referral Network online. You will find their link posted under “Useful Links 4 Moms”.

A Fresh Start

2007-04-11T09:19:00.000-07:00

When I walked into Phoenix’s new school (Circle of Friends) on Monday, the contrast to Westside Shorty’s (see earlier post) was dramatic! Even though Phoenix had only visited the class for a couple of hours last Thursday, she was eager to join her group. Children and parents approached us and introduced themselves as we hung her coat up and signed her in. The room where my daughter would be spending most of her class time was painted soft pink and had large windows allowing light to fill the space. The teachers all appeared to be adults and were down on the floor interacting with and greeting children as they slowly filed in; each one of them smiling and seemingly happy to be there. Phoenix practically pushed me out the door shouting "Bye Mama!" as her class prepared for their morning circle time.

Last Thursday’s class observation time had gone well. Phoenix had been timid at first. She clung to me begging me not to leave her but once circle began her fear gradually subsided. My heart lifted as I watched both of the teachers dance, sing, and play games with the children. Something I had rarely seen at her former daycare. Not one child was unable to stay involved in the group time activities, and Phoenix joined in half way through. I was amazed at how seamlessly the classroom routine came together. I was also relieved when I was able to take a good look at the outside play area. The playground for the older children was huge and covered mostly in grass. There was a large wooden play structure as well as a tire swing that many of the children were eagerly waiting their turn to play on. In the center of the yard a large sand box entertained several children and off to the side of the tire swing there was yet another sand pile where two young boys, along with my daughter, used shovels to dig. It was a perfect space for outdoor activities.

The owner spent an hour answering all my questions and addressing my concerns. She is a very patient woman and I appreciated her candor and support. For the first time since I arrived in Bend, I knew that my oldest child would be well taken care of.

I thought I might cut Phoenix’s first day in her new class short in order to allow her to adjust slowly. I told her teacher to call if she needed anything. I was fully prepared to get little work done, and I was sure I would be worried all day wondering about how Phoenix was adjusting. To my surprise the day flew by and my mind was at ease. When I arrived to pick my daughter up at 5pm she ran up to me smiling and chattering a mile a minute in an attempt to tell me all about the fun things she had done. Her afternoon teacher met me at the gate and introduced herself. She politely asked me for my ID explaining “I have to do this the first time just to make sure…” I was surprised but pleased.

On our short drive home my heart soared as Phoenix shared the new songs she had learned with me and her little sister, Rain. She sang all of the way home stopping only once to say “Mama, it feels like I want to keep this school.” And so she will!

Why Mom2Mom?

2007-04-07T15:34:00.000-07:00

“Your daughter seems fine to me but if you aren’t happy with our program you are welcome to find another childcare for her.” There was a slight pause and then, “You don’t even have to give me two weeks notice.” The sneer came over the line like a smack in the face and it suddenly hit me: there are no whistle blower laws in effect when it comes to addressing questionable child care practices. My daughter could be kicked out of preschool and I could be unable to work all because I didn’t keep my concerns to myself.

So there it was; supply and demand at its worst. Living in Bend, Oregon for the last year and a half has brought my family many joys but quality childcare has not been one of them. As most Bend mothers can attest, this small town’s growth spurt has wreaked havoc on the high schools and elementary schools as well as the preschools and childcare programs. Classrooms are packed and even the worst programs can thrive off of parents’ desperation. In real estate I believe they call this a “seller’s market.” But we aren’t buying houses here. We aren’t dealing with property. What we are dealing with is our children’s development and wellbeing and that’s what makes this particular situation so heart breaking.

I had had some pretty severe concerns about my oldest daughter’s daycare situation for months. Between finding whole groups of children unsupervised at the end of the day and being unable to check my child in or out on the sign in machine for weeks, red flags had started popping up. To make matters worse, the director/owner seemed to be on hiatus and the only teachers available to address my concerns were barely old enough to drive.

My husband and I discussed approaching the owner together but our fear that it might lead to our daughter being treated poorly by the staff drew us up short. Finally, she started dreading going to school and crying every morning as we struggled to get her ready. That sealed the deal. I was determined to find her a better preschool.

That’s when I launched my month long, in depth search and inquiry into the actual resources that this town has to offer children and their families. These resources and their links/contact info, along with my experiences, will be revealed throughout this blog. For now, however, let’s just say that I only found a few really good programs (and I do mean really good) that were all full and had waiting lists about a year long. Many of the people I spoke to along the way, including the directors of the high quality daycares, urged me to approach the owner of my daughter’s school with my concerns. They told me that it could help her improve her program, and they insisted that they would want their parents to do the same.

Frustrated and still uncomfortable with the thought of approaching the preschool’s owner, I spent another month mulling over the possibility of opening a daycare along with a friend of mine who was faced with similar frustrations. After all I had spent 7 years working with children in various educational settings (including preschools), so I figured I was more than qualified; but my budding career as a freelancer put a damper on my enthusiasm.

Finally the day came when I could no longer stand it. For the third morning in a row my little girl cried and begged to stay home as I struggled in vain to get her dressed. Upon arriving at her school I was unable to sign her in for the second WEEK in a row and of course the owner was nowhere to be found. I spent the rest of that day fretting over my daughter’s wellbeing as I desperately tried to complete my work. Sure that she was suffering though her day, I decided to pick her up early and as I expected I was greeted with a tear streaked face that broke my heart. Turning to the nearest teacher (a 16 year old who also happened to be our babysitter) I quickly relayed my long list of concerns, including the legality of not being able to sign my child in or out, and insisted that they be addressed by the owner immediately.

“I run a great program, have great teachers, and don’t appreciate you questioning whether or not I’m running things legally.” The owner snapped once we finally made contact. “Your child seems perfectly fine to everyone here so I don’t think we can help you.” The threat was clear, “Either you take what I give you with out question, or you can take your kid and shove it…. Oh and by the way, good luck finding another preschool opening for your child.” Needless to say, the rest of the conversation didn’t go well. To make a long story short it ended in my husband immediately canceling the daycare check while I sobbed behind the wheel of my Jeep.

This was the single most horrible moment I have had since moving to Bend but it was also one of the best moments because in my desperation to find an immediate solution to my daycare situation, my mind began rummaging through all of the information and resources I had come across over the last couple of months. What I immediately realized was that people were my best resources. No, to be more exact, other mothers were my best source of information and support. As a member of the MOMS club of Bend, I knew I had access to a large number of women who would gladly support me in anyway they could. The comfort that this thought brought me also gave me strength and I spent the next hour calling all the mothers I could and believe it or not, by the end of that hour I had two preschool tours set up and I was in the position of choosing where my child would go!

That was the moment that the idea for the Mom2Mom blog was born. As I sat there filled with relief I wondered…What if the moms of bend all came together to share their resources and information with each other? What if collectively we insist that our children are well cared for and funnel our money into only those programs that best serve our families needs? What if we find a way to pool our resources and find alternative care for our children instead of enrolling them in programs we aren’t 100% happy with? What if we only support the high quality programs that are trying to expand to accommodate our needs? As the answers came to me I realized that if we can come together and do all of these things, then we can make a difference in this community. We can truly make this our town; and then the businesses that are supposed to be serving our families will be persuaded to provide quality services in order to thrive and we will rest easy knowing our children are getting the best we can possibly offer them.